It’s funny, everyone calls it a DOHC motor and you’ve actually made the distinction of calling it out as Mercury motor. I appreciate that, and this car. #WisconsinProud

Let’s see if that could be a BMW by checking the pixels.

Thank you. How did you know I prefer brunettes? I will very carefully check her emissions for compliance with all relevant guidelines.

And I’d like to thank my son for his obsessive Playmobil collecting, which is why I know they have a prison in the first place.

Pretty sure this isn’t how direct injection works

I suspect this will be the Tesla most of them will ride in.

Those pictures remind me of being in middle-school sex ed, and they show you weird pictures of anatomy that are excessively detailed, and you’re kind of aroused, but also confused and a bit frightened.

Detroit? Corrupt Cops? No problem! Omni Consumer Products has the solution!

This is my shitbox.
There are many like it, but this one is mine.
My shitbox is my best friend.
It is my life.
I must master it as I master my life.
Without me, it is useless.
Without my shitbox, I am useless.

I MISS MY FIRST CAR NOW. EVEN IF IT WAS A SHIT BOX IT WAS MINE AND MINE ALONE AND I GOT LAID IN IT AND IT LEFT ME STRANDED MORE THAN ONCE ON ROAD TRIPS.

I drove my friends BMW and used the turn signals.

Called “The Predator” as it comes equipped with a three point laser pedestrian detection system.

“No words in the English language suck more in racing than “event cancelled.””

It’s just Toyota is so busy. They have so much work to do to be bothered with finishing the Supra.

I couldn’t get it to work. It asked me to enter my salary...then abruptly redirected me to chrysler.com.

Dudes! If you didn’t have Faygo, Better Made potato chips, and Lafayette Coney Island while there you did not go to Detroit.

Wait: so are you telling me other motorists are *frequently* telling me that they are #1 or that I am #1?

Well, maybe the car wanted a taco, and was waiting patiently for its turn.

Given the stress on that last button, I think we’re about to see the airbags deploy.

This man hears you on that one.

Fuck yeah!