Kobe’s post-retirement statue is going to look pretty epic when they put it right under Shaq’s ass.

“Two guys that I’m super close with and it’s sticky, man.”

And they said Kobe couldn’t get people up out of their seats anymore.

they had all of recorded human history up until about 2003 to get good at it.

Cam Newton is one of the most unprofessional, unsportsmanlike individual on the face of the planet.

Walker goes on to say that he made Phil Jackson stop the bus, at which point he invited Kobe to step outside with him.

Jeez, ESPN, we know he’s not that good, but it’s just rude to refer to Austin Rives as equipment staff.

He Griffin-punched a Griffin-door?

If it turns out that Blake has hand cancer, we’ll know for sure.

Explains timing of Josh Smith trade!*

Josh Smith, a guy with multiple locker room altercations already this year, gets traded for nothing. A few days later we learned that Blake broke his hand in an “undisclosed team-related incident.” I bet the two are related.

The University of Missouri Law Enforcement division released a statement as well, stating they will not rest until they find a black student to arrest for providing the cocaine.

Well, he don’t eat meat, but he sure like the coke. MATTY MAUK, SHE’S A VEGETARIAN

Mauk: [Sees line of white powdery substance]

He always said he wanted to play like Johnny Manziel... http://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/n…

I know someone who did cocaine with Stevie one night in the 90s.

Stevie Wonder isn’t blind

There’s no way Lee Harvey Oswald acted or shot alone in JFK’s assassination.

That the New York Jets have, in fact, won a Super Bowl.

Fixed.