I’ll Debbie Downer this competition real fast.

True confessions: O-Town was my first concert, and my friend and I made a sign that said “Ashley is our Angel.”

When babies are very small, they are not even capable of manipulating us in that way. I’m not sure at what age they are, but when a baby cries, it has a need, either hunger, cold, wetness, or just a need to be held.

said the woman who wouldn't gain 10lbs at her drs advice to get pregnant.

If you turn out the bathroom lights and say "Taylor Swift" 3 times into the mirror, you can smell a litterbox.

I hate it when people put toppings on good cheesecake.

You'd think, especially being women, they'd know it's never a good idea to wear white during one's period piece.

Sorry about your childhood. But what does that have to do with losing your arm? Don't use your sister's rape to pad your backstory. That's creepy.

Upon regularly explaining to my ex why I don't want him to promise that he will call our son at a specific time or date (because he goes at least a week between any sort of contact with us and winds up letting down a little kid), he regularly replies:

I just get so bored. There isn't anything to do. I'm so lonely. I…

People have feelings about Ben Stiller that are not hate? Imagine that.

Not me. If anything, the fact that she's having to do what women so often have to do, be conciliatory or gracious in the face of bullshit, shows that her training to be a sports celebrity has already started.

Anise

At first I thought the place was empty, but as Kyle fled they showed the back and it was full of normal Dutch folk! Also I feel like when they reviewed the plot points for that episode, they were like yo Kyle can you wear this cape? It will really heighten the scene.

I am not otherwise OCD but when I buy Froot Loops (not very often) I have to make sure I have one and only one of each color/flavor on every spoonful. I will go to great lengths to make this happen. Also, I feel like it's cheating if I use any method to get the colors/flavors on my spoon besides just my spoon. It's a…

I have a habit in the morning of turning on the shower, and while waiting for the water to warm up, I poop. I poop in the toilet, by the way... not in the shower, if you guys needed that clarification. Anyways, because I don't want to flush and make the water boiling hot (which I have no idea if this is even the…

Some people actually still think of a sex as a spiritual act that bonds you to another person... I'm not even religious and I get this.

We're all full of fire retardant and pesticides anyway, so who gives a shit?

It was so much easier to imagine celebrities being funny and clever before Twitter.

He's happy. Who did he eat?

Becoming a bed maker has lead to more restful sleep. I can't claim it would have that effect on anyone else, but why not try it?