Oh man, this is great! My mom will be so happy; she didn't think I would ever fake-internet-settle-down.

Did someone say fake-internet-plural-marriage with Penabler? Are you still accepting applications? I'm good at stuff and have references.

I've lived in Ft. Lauderdale, Orlando, and Tallahassee. I'm pretty familiar with Miami, St. Pete, Clearwater, Jacksonville, Key West and to a lesser extent Daytona, Jacksonville, Sarasota, The Space Coast, and Gainsville. I've driven every mile of I95, I75, I10, and the Turnpike in the state. I feel like I have a…

I'm actually able to tan (I take color very well, unlike my siblings who inherited pale Irish skin from my mom) but I'm perfectly happy to let myself go pasty in the winter. I work outside in the summer and can't avoid getting tan, even with sunscreen, but my dad (who has the same skin as me) looks like leather. I'm…

I think the government has gotten way way worse than when I was a kid, but I don't know about the violence level. I think most of the coke in this country was coming through South Florida when I was growing up and the violence was really bad. Things have gentrified a lot in some places, so I'm a little less afraid to…

Yeah, about 330-350 of us walked but 30-50 of those finished their degrees in night school and I went to one of the better public schools in the area. The university system is pretty good, but it's 2x as expensive as it was when I went to school.

You guys can have it. I bought a good coat and my hair looks amazing in low humidity.

This isn't snobby outside hate though. I lived in Florida until I was 22, went to school at one of its most well-known universities, lived in two of the largest metro areas and spent significant amounts of time in all the others. The crazy things that happen in Florida are crazier than the crazy things that I've seen…

Just a little hyperbole to start your morning. I know that there are good people doing good things in Florida, but I've been a lot of places in the world and Florida is just a unique phenomenon (although it did seem significantly less crazy under Lawton Childs or even Charlie Christ than it does under Scott). Most of…

True story—I mean there are ways to succeed in Florida, some of my friends do have good careers but my high school freshmen class started with 500 and only 3oo of us walked across the stage. For a lot of the people I went to school with doing well means a management position with benefits in the service industry.

All of us who ever wanted to do something with our lives left Florida when we got the chance. I do miss the palm trees but not the fuckery.

Oh man, I've been told that before. I just can't...even...

My dad is the kind of guy who would post one of these memes and say "see, you liberals think you're so great, but you ignore the real stories". I try to avoid TV news at all costs, however my dad loves to watch it during dinner (often Fox, but sometimes the local "if it bleeds, it leads" station). Whenever I go home…

Yes, yes, it helps a lot. I've been standing right next to trans people who are getting treated poorly, while get treated normally. You have no idea how often I've been told that I'm: "not what we expected", "not like them", etc...

A) thank you that cleared a lot of things up for me.

I think the main reason it bugs me is that I actually had my hair really short for a long time and now that it's at my shoulders I think of it as longer (technically medium length) and definitely not a bob. Stupid media imposing it's labels on my hair's identity. Did they ever consider how my hair would feel?

Yeah, I've been really confused since this became a thing because I've always associated the bob hair cut with the definition of bob that means to cut something short and then tie it off in a bunch (like you can with rope or a horse's tail) so the 40's and 50's version of the haircut always made sense to me. Thanks…

I know, right? What's wrong with "shoulder length" or "above the Shoulders? Maybe it's just my background, but still think of anything that can be comfortably pulled back as variations on long hair. My hair is shoulder length and heavily layered, but it still feels like a substantial amount of hair.

Okay, can someone clarify this for me? I know we've talked about this before, but does bob just mean above the shoulders now? Is this something that has changed or has that always been the definition? I thought it was supposed to be around chin length and usually curled under, rather than out.

I was kind of chuckling along to myself until that line, then I straight lost it. Well played. Well played indeed.