Right? What the fuck are the Cowboys doing sharing all of this? Can you imagine Bill Belichick shitting on one of his own draft picks the day after the draft like this?

Patrice O’Neal said he judged comedians by how they bombed, not how well they could kill a room. I’ve never found Wilmore funny, but this was some grade A bombing. I have to give him credit for that.

You guys sucked today. Where is Patrick? Why did you publish a grand total of 5 posts? I AM NOT ENTERTAINED

The one mistake they made last season was making the playoffs as an 8 seed instead of taking a run at the lottery. Rozier and RJ Hunter will never contribute to any roster but the Maine Red Claws and they already have like seventy guards. They should have seen where the chips fell in the lottery because even if they…

In this article you say the video had been shopped before. Why didn't you buy it? Did they want too much?

People who party a lot and are in college today: how do you ensure that your shenanigans don't end up on the internet? I would have been so fucked if everyone at every party I attended carried a recording device at all times

This is also common in CNC machining. They use computers older than Jesus because of the expensive upgrade process. There are a bunch of funny stories on /r/talesfromtechsupport from flabbergasted computer store workers about this

This is oddly specific for a joke. Are you the one who posted these?

The solution here is for hiring committees to install personal tracking apps on all of their acquaintances’ devices and spend more time hanging out at botanical gardens.

My advice: if you live a city with an intricate housing market (one where, for example, real estate values in one area have nearly doubled in the last five years mere blocks away from houses that haven’t appreciated in value in over 20 years,) ignore the advice you read on blogs and in places like r/personalfinance…

In the last 20 years basketball and football have both migrated to stretch offenses in order to create space for their playmakers. This game was an indictment of how soccer tactics have gone the other way. This crowd the ball like 9 year old town soccer stuff is fine if everyone on your team has Barcelona ‘10…

This is why I’ll cheer when Twitter goes the way of MySpace. There’s no excuse for a company with so many resources to fail to moderate blatant torts. Reddit hosts abusive subs, but in the ones that aren’t and actually have subscribers it’s very aggressive in precluding abuse, both of the form of user downvoting that…

I tried to care about this, but I failed :-(

Yup. Everything else checked out but as soon as I read that I knew it was bs

He makes Bryant Gumbel sound like Samuel L Jackson.

Wait, come on, Poe’s law. Did he actually post these or did you create them yourself to satirize him? I don’t do MyFace and have no idea whether or not these were real things people were disseminating.

There is 100% chance she knows all of his phone and social media passwords. Zero doubt in my mind.

Joint bachelor party at the museum? Let me check my calendar...oh man, sorry, looks like I’m going to be returning some videotapes that night.

But having a joint bachelor/ette celebration has the benefit of actually cutting down on any potential awkwardness—you don’t have to buy into gender essentialism to recognize that certain (sexist) traditional bachelor party events might be impacted by the presence of the groom’s little sister while also facilitating…