Something about code words and being scrappy or something.

Gregg Popovich is the cranky old uncle who on your 18th birthday gives you the best advice you will ever hear in your lifetime, something that you will carry in your heart for the rest of your days.

Bill Belichick is the cranky old uncle who loses you in a card game with heroin dealers.

I think you all need to search the link to “upset mom writes crazy letter to Cam Newton”. I could give you the link, but consider working for it will be your penance. And then star our friend from Malta.

It’s less “ha ha” funny and more “Cam Newton gets shit for doing something no one questions any white guy in the league for doing because he’s black” funny.

The “Joke”

The Joke.

Very good.

This is really long and I didn’t read it.

Dear Mr. Watt,

You can stop trying so hard, Missouri. You already got into the SEC.

I always figured if I won the lottery I would randomly tip servers a couple hundred bucks. I feel like people shit all over them and a reminder that all customers aren’t entitled jerks goes a long way. I'm glad Kevin Smith is a good guy; I always assumed he would be.

Let’s all make a promise that when/if we become famous, we will all be Kevin Smith Famous.

I would have thought Colonel Sanders would be a breast man.

Well shit, had I known you could use stories about people being nice...

He’s also uber-supportive of teachers, another thing that makes my sister love him so much.

This is only tangentially a food story, but it ends up in a Starbucks, so there you go.

...but my Shepard was male...

“physician and attorney." Holy humblebrag.

I feel like if everyone understood the “Not everyone can do that,” this would be an easier discussion to have.

If there’s anyone out there that actually thinks being poor is simple, then they deserve a right punch in the face.