Interesting. I turn the stove to high, and spray some Pam into a pan. I crack two eggs directly into the pan, and start furiously scrambling with a hard spatula. 30 seconds later, when the eggs are fully cooked, I scrape them onto a small empty plate, and eat them (no ketchup). Because they're eggs, i.e. the…

Thomas Jefferson? Does she know anything about history? Does she even know who Thomas Jefferson is? Has she ever even read the Constitution?

Who are the men who look at themselves in the mirror when they masturbate?

1) He didn't know how to spell Amistad. Is it really that hard? And he still spelled it wrong.

Bullshit. Johnny Cash and Ray Charles get their own individual biopics. But of course, three Women of Color have to SHARE their biopic. Typical sexism. This should have been a trilogy.

Yeah, I think the "think about the kids" argument is definitely out there. I don't really buy it myself, because there's a lot of things professional athletes do, legal, illegal and otherwise, that minors shouldn't emulate.

I always thought the hallmark of being a professional athlete was to entertain and win. I, personally, do not much care whether part of someone's training regimen was ingesting a substance. Speaking of which, I doubt there are many elite athletes at any level who don't take some sort of supplement. What is the line…

Hmmm...not sure I understand your comment.

I get why these guys should be suspended. There's a rule, they broke it, that's cheating, and that's fine. But I've never seen a satisfactory explanation for why PED's should be banned in the first place. Why do we care that a professional athlete does what it takes to be the best? It's pretty obvious all we care…

There is no worse liberal than the first letter writer; the one who "values diversity" and just wants more black friends so she can be empathetic to the plight of the blacks (or whatever)!

The reason chain of custody rules are implemented, and are important, is because you want to be convinced that the evident is what it purports to be; you don't want there to have been an opportunity to tamper with the evidence to change its character. To me, the rest of the quote is just a statement of the reason for…

Unbelievable. Just unbelievable. I've said it before: There just is no worse time on Jezebel than when Doug Barry gets ahold of the site for a whole weekend, and can't even be bothered to post anything slightly rational/entertaining/meaningful. Will he bother responding to this comment or updating the article to…

What the fuck are you babbling on about? Her opinions are "hopelessly individual and therefore irrelevant?"

This is a great and brilliant article. I can't wait to throw it in the Catholic Church's face! Don't you feel silly now, Catholic Church! Your position is the opposite of Satan's position!

If you're talking about the article that was linked to, there was not tremendous thought behind it, or at least if there was, it was not evidenced by the words the writer chose to put down. To the contrary, it's quite obvious that, because of her distaste for certain members of her family who happened to be Holocaust…

This is a nice column and all, but I think that South Park episode does a much better job, Sciencedammit.

"I'm viewing this like a prosecutor dissecting a witness" is exactly the right way to approach discussing whether a fucking 20-year old had a hangover in the offseason.

If a linebacker showed up hungover to the Manning passing academy, I think people would be confused about why a linebacker was at a passing academy.

1) I took four years of French in school, and I couldn't carry on a conversation. Granted, I'm an idiot, but I went to French class every day for 180 days out of the year for 4 straight years! And I still don't really know it (and never really did)! Point being, learning a new language as an adult is difficult,…

Right. Except he CAN control himself. There are very few people who literally cannot control themselves, and they are called "insane." Everyone else is just deciding to be a dick.