Anybody else just feel their vagina slam shut?

50 women picked up gargabe out of a river, read the romantic note attached, and thought, “Yeah this doesn’t sound like it’s gonna get me murdered, let’s go for it!”

Fredo Jr. is going for a boat ride.

America is the estranged and bitter teenager who just lectured Europe-Mom for being a drunk divorcee, slammed the car door, yelled “I’ll never be like you!”, reversed out of the driveway, and straight into a passing bus.

I blame the government. Who expects old white people in Florida to comprehend intersectionality?

cleanser for your eyes

And, remember when that Iraqi reporter threw both his shoes at the president, and he dodged both of them with cat-like agility, and you were proud of him for like a full two second before you remembered he totally destroyed their country?

“A shaman named Colleen McCann”?

Please don’t insult everyone by inferring that Crosby is somehow the more witty of ANY two players in the NHL at any time, ever.

Covfefe is the moment when Trump became President

It’s interesting how she framed these remarks in terms of the impact of watching 20 films in a short period of time. I was on the jury for a film festival a few years back (a small, local festival, basically the opposite of Cannes), and the process made me realize how much violence against women is a default narrative…

Phil’s sister, Ammanda, has Olympic Silver and several World gold medals and 2 NCAA national championships. She has his scoring touch with the benefit of actually playing defense every shift. Having seen her in 100 games or so I don’t think I ever heard her yell at anyone, all she does is score, keep the other team…

More and more this whole nightmare is looking like a really bad production of The Wizard of Oz - except worse - because we’re living it.

Can you compress human ashes into a brick? Maybe they can build that wall after all.

Before ACA, my dad had lung cancer. He was convinced he was going to die so he decided not to treat and leave my mom in horrible debt. He died in the middle of the night after not being able to move off the couch for three weeks. No pain meds. No hospital stay. Nothing but my mom sleeping on the other couch watching…

While this was a disaster, the wild pigs complaint is invalid. I saw an article where the wild pigs are considered a tourist attraction and people come to see them.

When I used to go to see the Indians play the Blue Jays with my dad, he insisted, for reasons known only to him, after mangling the Star Spangled Banner, to also try to sing O Canada. He’d do it more quietly, and mumble, so it took several times listening for me to realize that he was singing, “O Canada, O Canada, how…

Wow. Nice. A hockey story during the Stanley Cup playoffs. So we get one hockey story on the front page of Deadspin vs 3 stories about video game players on the cross-promoted Compete website. Fucking video games.

fuck any hockey fan with the gall to clutch their pearls tonight and let crosby skate for the same shit last week.

US: Don’t stop / Yield, accelerate to cut off the car that is in the segment you are about to enter, leave blinker on and flip everyone off.