Is Russell Wilson so intolerable? The take home message from the Deadspin commenters: I hate everyone.

Maybe if he acted like he’d been there before, he wouldn’t be acting like he’s been here before.

Time to leave, Dr. Doak.

What a reach.

Why? Because he reproduced their comments in full and with a minimal amount of commentary about the content - with that commentary being more of a contextual summation (‘this argument is often found in a separate context; that argument came without prompting’) - and then ended by saying he’s glad athletes forwent…

Armored car: made to move itself around without getting hurt
Tractor: made to bend nature to the will of man

“TOMORROW IS PAY DAY”

Needs more Zukovsky.

STOP LOOKING AT MY SCREEN!

He then proceeded to give them all unreasonably detailed directions to this week’s game, encouraging them to “leave enough time to get there,” because “there’s a lot of assholes on the road these days.”

This seems like Deadspin being angry for the sake of being angry.

“I shoulda gone to art school.”

also, one of the best subtly political sketches:

Black Ice

Oh wow man, you must’ve been really scared to not be able to leave your house (assuming you were included in this which at this point I have to say is doubtful). I bet that took a long time, maybe say a year or two of getting shitfaced and yelling Boston Strong at sporting events, to get that trauma out of your system.

I respect Marc Fucarile’s father, but not you or anyone else who shouts to everyone within earshot that you’re strong and overcoming adversity because of what he’s going through.

perfect for all your back road lesbian activties