In most regards, I think the Trump administration is extremely transparent, in the sense that I always understand what they're trying to do and why they want to do it, no matter how much bullshit they pile on top of it. But for the life of me, I can't understand why Sean Spicer sticks around. I mean, somebody clearly…

This doesn't seem like a very good use of your time.

Kind of like how the most racist people lose their shit at the suggestion that they might be racist. Just own up to it! People will actually respect that slightly more!

That's some prescriptivist garbage. "Y'all" is obviously a perfectly cromulent word.

See it ain't so!

I completely understand where you're coming from. I thought he was clearly unfit for office from the moment he declared his candidacy, but once he won, I thought, "Well, I'll have an open mind and see what he does, and I can always go back to hating him if he starts in with some stupid bullshit." Which happened…

Is there like a standard handbook they give y'all that contains the same dozen or so context-free factoids and asinine talking points? Because it's really bizarre how every right-wing moron I talk to, no matter how little they know about anything else, seems to have this one exact statistic committed to memory and…

You're an idiot.

Man, I really hope there's a level where you get to fight the Klan.

Man, I really hope this is the game we get. Let me start out with all the usual shit, and then upgrade to new stuff that I haven't seen before. How about a Half-Lifesque gravity gun? A fancy space zipline you can deploy to cross long gaps? A straight up jetpack?

Mortal Kombat's not too bad for what it is. That's probably the current pinnacle of video game adaptations, the surprisingly decent Mortal Kombat. Some people like Resident Evil, I only saw the first one but I thought it was stupid.

Man, I might have to get a pack of brats to grill tonight. Usually I just throw them on the grill raw, but I recently saw somebody do the beer bath in a skillet right on the grill and I've been wanting to try it ever since.

I didn't get to kill enough Nazis in the The New Order, so I guess I have to buy this so I can kill more Nazis.

When I was a teenager I used to work at this marina where one of my duties included periodically going over and scaring the geese off the beach with a starter pistol. It worked pretty well for a while but eventually some of the geese started to become indifferent to the pistol and it got to where I had to aggressively…

I know this is a metaphor for some aspect of modern society, but I'll be damned if I can figure it out.

Man, I grilled corn last night! Wish I had known about this then. I've never even heard of an elote before but it looks awesome.

"Let's call this a full hour."

All's Well That Ends Wet

The Draining of the Shrew
Love's Labour's Leaked
Hamwet

You can probably assume these people haven't seen or read the play.