My favorite gift for every baby girl is The Paper Bag Princess.

Oh honey, I have about 20 years of Sir Patrick dreams - all of them very very dirty. Periodically Mr Boots asks if I would still love him if he were bald. Oh yes I would. Yes. I would.

Damnit. I was so hoping this was some sort of kardashian/Hilton fashion smackdown.

I used to work in the Fox News building. In the mornings I had to elbow my way through the hordes of Midwesterners looking for the gift shop. Gift Shop?????

On about my third date with Mr. Boots, I farted. I was mortified. He looked at me, smiled, and said "you never have to be embarrassed about that in front of me." I knew then he was the man for me.

I know nothing of this Shoneys but everyone knows the hash browns are the real reason to go to Waffle House. Besides, I have boycotted IHOP ever since they got rid of boysenberry syrup.

I'm with you. My BF and I live together with no intention of getting married and at our (middle) age, calling him my boyfriend seems silly. Partner is too 70s and lover too sordid.

I was in an Ann Taylor store yesterday and there was a dog in the store, granted it was in a stroller so maybe the clerks just thought it was a really ugly baby.

Based on my exhaustive scientific study of this topic, I concur.

Every time Ewan McGregor shows his penis in a movie, an angel gets his wings, or something.

I bet she has red roots too!

Somewhere, a gate agent is high fiving her friends and cackling uncontrollably.

In their defense (or defence), snog is a pretty useful word.

I don't get a douche-y vibe. I get a stoned vibe. Very very stoned.

Baby Girl Beckham? Ah, that explains the especially bright star in the sky last night.

Every little girl should have a copy of that book. It is my standard baby gift because girls are never too young to learn that lesson!

Hmm. Guess I have to head for Texas because I have never seen one in New York. Maybe Andy Cohen has a few extra.

I am thoroughly confused by this Skinny Girl line. I am extremely fond of the cocktails yet I have NEVER seen Skinny Girl anywhere except on a Bravo show.