I treated this article like I treat hockey: I read the headline and skimmed the article. The writer is kind of pissed because he’s Canadian. I get it.

This is what happens when your safe word is “harder.”

The people who think Belvedere is top shelf also have a freezer loaded with Trump Steaks.

Sure he can throw and run, but what about his e-mails?

You sayin’ Puig ain’t white?

I was at that game and that catch happened right in front of me. One thing the camera doesn’t show is Puig’s incredibly clear DGAF attitude throughout the game.

You can’t have a combined 101 points scored without fantastic defense.

Which NFL coach should be fired but won’t?

We get that he’s OUR President. You need to get that we can still point out that he’s an illiterate, narcissistic misogynist.

Is it bad to hope to see that Russian’s hand squished? Asking for a friend.

Not sure Keanu qualifies as an actor. Sorry.

No, he’s African American.

Even though kids these days don’t seem to know them, who’s your favorite Marx Brother?

Nipples and labias stick to many things. I believe sports are one of them.

Which Deadspin staffer has the worst workplace flatulence?

What should I name him?