...and I’m 17 and in high school again. Thank you.

Thank you! I bought it in January and absolutely love it. It's the first even remotely sporty car I've owned and I'm having a blast with it!

How about blocking a double parker while being able to fit in one spot yourself?

Maybe this is just me, but if I see a really nice car out by itself in a parking lot but the lot’s starting to fill up and it’s just a matter of time before people will be parking next to it, I will go park next to it and give it a good margin of space to create something I like to call a car-bro buffer. Do other car…

I’m guessing you like a lot of caramel in your frappuccino.

What actually is the going rate for monogramming a thermos nowadays, anyway?

except, there’s paying a lot for nice reliable cars, then paying the same. Again. In service and parts charges. Imagine a company that goes, ‘no, no, put your wallet away, you paid a lot for your car and expected it to be as good as we promised in the adverts you believed when you bought it. We got this.’ that’s…

He isn’t a guy who made a stupid joke, this mentality kills me. Peoples’ speech doesn’t exists in a magic bubble apart from their actions. See if he made this joke to a couple like minded men, he would still be a dick but that would actually be less bad the what he did. This mindset is so deep seated in his worldview…

True dat, as my cousin in New Orleans would say.

The hottest nightclub in town is... HELL. It has everything: Saddam Hussein, KY super soakers, third leg warmers....

Can confidently say that no one say that coming...

No, this is Usher in the age of the hyper hatch;

I use an unscented moisturizer every morning (Aveeno Ultra Calming SPF 15), and when I know I’ll be in the sun I use Neutrogena’s Dry Touch Ultra Sheer 70. It’s a good combo for a guy as neither of those smell and they work very well.

Minidisc and minidisc accessories...

You are excellent. Thank you.

They’re basically the Food Babe of the environmental organization world. Click bait and shiny press releases to lure people in, just enough science to sound legitimate.

I always tell people that literally—literally—the only planned part of a wedding that people remember is the dress and the cake. Otherwise its just a bored blur and the occasional insanity.

YOU TAKE BACK THOSE EVIL WORDS.

I always tell people planning their wedding to do whatever they want and make sure they have an open bar. You can make your bridesmaids wear tie dyed taffeta cocktail dresses but as long as there’s an open bar, they’ll forgive you. You decide a vegetarian menu when half of your family hunts? Open bar will make them…