I'm just saying, like us gay dudes, that's how cats say hello.

Well, ScratStich, if that's even your real name, you see, when a man loves a woman and it's his birthday…

That's how I say hello to the guys I meet on Grindr, too.

They don't need your stinking defense! We love cats BECAUSE they're assholes. That's why they're the perfect American pet.

He is correct and you are a sick freak. I'll pray for you.

It can only help in the State that killed JFK (seriously, the anti-JFK fervor in Texas at the time was insane! Both right-wing Dems, which was the entire state of Texas and the entire South at the time, and right-wing Republicans wanted him dead because of Cuba and civil rights, which he didn't even really push.) If…

Your tone seems very pointed right now.

Of course not, you're not a real country anyway.

I'd like to shit in his mouth, just to shut him up for a few minutes but I really do think he'd enjoy it too much (no judgment!) On the bright side, it should all be over soon. I mean, it's already been four years so his term is almost up, right? Right??!!! I mean, it's been years and years now! Why aren't you…

That's ok because Baldwin is a streetfighter and we don't have enough of those on the left. What I'm saying is, he's the asshole we need right now.

And the blood of newborns. Peter Thiel isn't the original baby-blood drinker, you know.

They didn't have plastic surgery or botox back then, though, so it's not a fair comparison. Plus, back then, they all smoked and drank like fish.

I'm pretty sure the camp barrier was broken for the first time when Abraham Lincoln put on that stupid top hat.

I was gonna do that anyway so the joke's on you!

So you're saying I absolutely have to see it? Stop selling, just shut up and take my money!

It's definitely in the top five along with "That's My Boy" and "Last Action Hero".

And Donald Trump!

He disagrees, obviously!

Then Master of Disguise will be my second movie. I know you won't let me down.

Is that the one that was called a little midget by the head of Disney?