A hot dog is not a sandwich because words exist only to impart humans with meaning. If you water down the meaning enough to make hot dog a sandwich, the word because less valuable.

There’s a market for you, believe me. Not everyone wants to see the same incest-trick-women-into-having-sex-with-you-or-rape-monster-girls schlock that’s dominating the scene right now.

If exploding bicycles are detrimental, the market will punish exploding bicycle makers by not purchasing their product.

Not shy about saying that I’ve looked to this trend as a possible way to make some money on the side... but man, the extremism of a lot of the most popular games is off-putting. It makes you feel like there’s an expectation that you have to include that content in order to make money, when all I really want to do is…

There’s nothing “cool” about a watchdog gov’t agency that denies us the freedom to buy dangerous consumer products! If I want to buy a bicycle that spontaneously explodes, that’s MY prerogative!

My point is :

Gosh, you’re wrong.

I’ve done provolone grilled cheese before. It’s good.

She’s Russian, it isn’t water, it is vodka.

I overcooked my scrambled eggs slightly yesterday morning, and the little bit of water that leaked out made me want to get involved in an international conspiracy to commit espionage. So I know exactly how she feels.

Tilda Swinton as a gender-swapped Famine.  I want this now.  

the hardest thing about writing the series was “the absence of Terry Pratchett from this world.”

I’m not sure whom I’m more jealous of:

A problem exacerbated by consumers being conditioned to expect “no cost”. We’ll be sorting out the effects of the internet on the written word and its various industries for decades. 

Intolerable decisions thread Okay I wanted to believe the AVC could rise up like a phoenix here but you.do.not.let. Sean. Fucking. O’Neal. Leave. He’s Sean O’Neal for fuck’s sake. He’s the guy who wrote most of everybody’s favourite stuff on here for the last several years.

I don’t think she showed up for a TV interview about veterans out of a sense of decency. I think she should up for a TV interview out of a sense of wanting to be on TV.

Listen, I fucking despise Sarah Palin, but I also don’t think it’s the height of hilarity to set her up in a situation where Cohen plays a wounded vet. It’s kind of pissing on somebody’s sense of decency - however lacking her sense of decency may normally be - for a laugh. If he had her there winning a bullshit award…

I’m betting the subterfuge went about as deep as “Hey Sarah. Wanna be on TV?”

“This incident has inpugned the dignity of people shoving highly processed pork tubes down their throats for sport.”

Let me be frank, you dun fucked up. When you mess up this bad you end up looking like a real weiner. I relish the opportunity to dunk on such sloppy counting. It must suck to know that when you can’t even make the correct call on a hot-dog eating contest, that as a sports commentator, you just can’t cut the mustard.…