All went well until the pigeons crapped on him and he stormed off the stage

@dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac: It's a cookbook

Choosing between listening to John Sterling and Suzyn Waldman or John Miller and Joe Morgan is like choosing between Hemorhoids or Jock Itch.

Did he offer you any Tylenol?

How could you not include that Hot Massive piece of flesh that interfered with Gardner catching the foul pop up?

They'll offer Taco bell, but hold out for Chipotle!

Tim shouldn't be writing on LSD.

Caption:President Muffley and General Turgidson react with skepticism at the Doctor's recommendation to use the best pitcher available.

@RedNed: The upper deck of Tropicana Field begs to differ.

@El-Diablo: W Bush does a helluva tuck.

"He doesn't know how to pronounce our name, and neither do any of the sportscasters. Or Deadspin, for that matter"

"It's a better ombudsman column than the ESPN ombudsmen have ever written"

@Karpovtsev_Says: (you're welcome for that setup)

Who knew Daulerio was a Jets fan? Thanks for the timing on this big distraction pal!

"As soon as he caught the ball, we could see that we had the crease we needed."

This is almost as good as the kid on the Grateful Dead message board asking about mixing motorboat, mushrooms and whiskey.

@CecilFieldersFriedChicken: And appears to be taking notes!

Wow. How has no one commented that Deford is not only reading the New York Post, but has it opened to Andrea Peyser's "column"! Alert Gawker!

" ... the framework of his article was intended ironically. However, it sure doesn't read that way to me "

I always thought "Fire Joe Morgan" was a failed letter writing campaign started by Harold Reynolds.