Kobe: I’ve been taking a look at some of your concepts, and I’m thinking I might actually perform better with less support on the court.

1-6 beyond the arc.

Are you implying this odor is indica-tive of Cleveland’s focus and preparation? 

You can’t IMBIBE weed. The word you’re looking for is “consuming”, guy who gets paid to word things!

You’re a fucking bum who’s been given the world.

Counterpoint: White Iverson is a great song with some great basketball metaphors and Post Malone is a refreshing artist these days.

The friction goes all the way back to the beginning, when Mike thought his name should be first.

I’m a die hard Celtics fan for 35 years, and I actually want to get a poster of that Wall shot going through the hoop with this Simmons tweet overlaid on it.

That’s a solid “Daniel Kicks Johnny in the Face” on Simmons’ list of 14 80s Movies that Explain Celtics Playoff Losses (and Why Magic Actually Committed an Offensive Foul on the Baby Sky Hook).

Coroner has ruled his death incomplete, siting the individual did not have two feet on the ground

Actually, many paleontologists now believe they just became birds.

To admit to voting for Trump was a mistake takes a level of self awareness that Trump supporters do not possess. They have bought into the Amway. The time share in Boca. The pyramid scheme. They have paid for the extended warranty on their leased Toyota Avalon. They are the temporarily inconvenienced future…

“Mitchell Trubisky” is a guy you call for insurance or getting your taxes done... his wife calls him “My Mitchy” and on summer Saturday afternoons all the guys in the neighborhood bro wave to him when he cruises by in his gunmetal blue Mustang convertible, saying “whatup Mitch!”

That’s a bold as hell, almost even Cavalier, take

Let me put this is terms you will understand:

Yeah, remember when LeBron hit that huge go-ahead three in game 7? Or when LeBron played that lockdown defense on Curry during the next possession and forced a bad shot? His classless, coattail-riding teammates never could have pulled off anything like that.

It’s easy. If you look at only the uppercase letters, they spell “The payoff was not worth the small effort it took to figure this out.”

41 points + 13 rebounds + 12 assists + game 3 = 69

Spicer: “So to sum up, we are dangerously close to nuclear war but HEY LOOK GRONK LULZ!”