Simpson dying in the saddle is possibly the best cycling story ever. So glad someone else mentioned this.

That's exactly what Landis did when he won the Tour for the US and was praised for bringing back American honesty. He was using a female purposed steroid creme the whole time.

Lol a British rider literally died in the saddle because they drank so much and did amphetamines and this was more than half a century ago! I could only wish to die drunk, on speed, and riding the Tour. A hero's death

The multiple Lance autobiographies I devoured as a kid got to be hilarious how he changed his tone, inspiration and stories with each one like no one would notice. Still, I wouldn't be so stoked on cycling it wasn't for LeMond and the great (yeah…) years of the Tour de Lance. I know people hate that name but they were…

This is the highlight of my summer to watch the exciting farce that is the Tour during the day and then watching this hilarious farce at night. I want a refund from Lance Armstrong and Jan Ullrich for getting me to spend my minimum wage high school earnings to go to the mountain stages and cheer them on like an idiot.…

The "Thicke-ning" is what happens after your Growing Pains

Service industry workers of the world unite! Best question I was asked after doing the fancy explanation of the pasta sauce was, "Yeah, I hear whatcha saying, but, is it a saucy sauce?" I still don't know what the fuck that means but I said no which made her happy.

I try to go French on steak and eggs. As rare and moist as I can while still being cooked. Kind of like tuna. Pepin taught me eggs and steak on PBS as a teenager and no one has said a better egg was made after I did it. But damn if a Waffle House steak and eggs at 3am doesn't deserve a Michelin Star.

Great name btw. Three best kitchen cons I've been part of are 1. Dirt cheap bourbon and farm salmon made into $30 "fresh caught salmon with a small batch bourbon glaze" 2. Serving water to performers because we gotta keep them on their feet but charging customers $12 a shot for Patron Silver when they think they just…

My dad soaks everything in this Chicago-centric Worcestershire-like steak sauce. I've seen the horror of everyone in my family and friends when he smells and inspects an expensive cut to say, "Wow! This is incredible!" and then drown it in super salty Chicago steak juice.

Whoa, ya got one answer to your out-of-line question…"Family"

My small south/midwest town had a hybrid mall that failed where you could skate inside while like 70% was a Burlington Coat Factory and not even a food court remained yet most of it was boarded up and you could watch the giant parking lot for street races every night. LA or Chicago was likely a better scene because…

Whatchu talkin bout my olive loaf? Next you're gonna come after my pickled pig feet and the beauty of cow tongue burritos and Sunday morning menudo ya heathen!

I dont care if youre the President or the drunk at the Flying J in Ohio, when you get a well done steak, we'll let your poor taste slide, but top that with ketchup and it's going down. Why destroy something good just to cover up your tracks with something only worth flavoring potatoes and meatloaf? FOR SHAME!

Two questions: Will she be mine? And why is a white Stratocaster the most desired guitar in the world?

Watch Julien Donkey Boy and not relish in Werner Herzog's dialog and antics. Btw "Winners never shiver!"

He was in a documentary as a commentator in the last few years super bloated with a mustache, cigar, Oakley glasses and Tommy Bahama shirt. It was glorious

You better hope they "fuck it fuck it don't suck it" and "make it make it don't fake it"

It may be a CW show but I demand those WB quality scripts dammit! What do you think!? Is this UPN!?

Never room for A Talking Cat!?!
Elitist bastards part of the global canine conspiracy that runs Petco's around the world