And HE WOULD HUG YOU BACK. He is that fucking awesome. He is that rare human being that it is impossible to dislike; he has successfully weaponized kindness.

#6. The previous owner masturbated all over the seats

EDIT: Never mind, I'm dumb and can't read, apparently. Also, Kinja, would a "delete post" function be too much to ask?

The Spongebob drawstring pants didn't help matters any, darlin'.

Not witty, no. But what haunts me is how utterly baffled she looks. That is not the face of someone who fully understands what is happening to them at this moment.

Most people don't need help in being awkward; it's how not to be awkward that's a bitch.

Watch how Cinnamon keeps pulling even with Emma, and ducking her head down to nudge the little girl to stay on the path. Human and animal have slightly different ideas about who's leading whom.

It sounds like he starts to call her by a different name—"Laura," perhaps?—then corrects himself. Any parent of more than one child can sympathize.

Was just gonna mention that. For those unfamiliar with the fiddle tune by this name, you may know it as "I'm Bringing Home a Baby Bumblebee."

With respect, typecasting is not inherently a feminist issue. Nor is the issue of being an auteur. Lena's work as an actor is, at the moment, associated more-or-less entirely with a body of work over which she has full creative control. With the exception of Saturday Night Live, we really haven't seen her work outside…

I don't think of Lena Dunham as a working actor in the same way that I don't think of, say, Woody Allen as a working actor. She's an auteur; so is he.

Wait, Lena Dunham is an actor now?

Some crazy euphemisms and typology in that original Kenya Post article. This is a social environment where a tabloid has to go through batshit contortions to avoid actually printing the words "bra" or "panties." BR@LESS!

SUGGESTED ALTERNATE TITLE: "God, There's Just No Pleasing Some People!"

Do teenagers read romance novels? I was always under the impression that the target demographic skewed considerably older. Why would teens even give a fuck?

AGAIN again: I'm talking strictly. In. A. Legal. Sense.

Read my post again, paying particular attention to the placement of the words "to her."

I stand by my statement that we don't need to fabricate facts to make Allen seem creepy, he does it all on his own. Speculation isn't necessary.

Again, I'm not saying you're wrong. But the point is to separate out the objective facts. How the children say they felt about Woody is, by definition, subjective. Factually—Woody was never Soon-Yi's stepfather.

Agreed. Straight-up character assassination.