How rude of me... would you like some caramel?

[Unbuckles belt]

...And then I said to the barista, "God, did you hear about journalism?"

"It's short for Andrew McCuntshitterwhofartsandshitsincunts-ington."

[Raises pinky]
[Sips from latte]

Can't they just graft on a donor leg from one of the other 15 Staal brothers?

Was it a Category 5?

Can't wait to get drunk and accidentally piss all over Office/Lab +160

As a tribute to Billy Martin, there won't be any skid marks.

"Looks more like a drinking fountain to m-" [gets hit by rolled-up newspaper]

What else would you expect for a team fueled by Curry?

Architects are hopeful that this design becomes a new American Standard.

I can understand why he was so angry. That burning smell? Some kids shoved tennis shoes in his exhaust pipe and he was able to remove the shoes, but he couldn't get the laces out.

The Electrocardiogram Slide.

Flaunting his sexuallity smh. Stick to football!

Do you recommend Pringles with it?

Enjoy this post before Ley sees it, folks.

Mother Goodell: It's a refrigerator box, honey. It can't really go back in time.

Next question: should i take off the plastic wrapper?

I was going to go with three.

Gonna be a lot of people in Baltimore with Joe Flacco jerseys tomorrow.

Unfortunately, it turned out half the people thought Rice was there signing autographs.