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Born on third base as the heir to an emerald mine, so people had to treat the guy with money like he was smart. Got lucky as a co-founder of PayPal and now believes that all of that makes him what the weird sycophants say he is.

The bigger mystery is why people who will never get any of his money are so eager to

I have no mercy for anyone who would use the deaths of children for gain, politics or fame” Musk said while completely missing the irony of the time he tried to do that when those kids were trapped in a cave

I guess the way it went for Chadwick Boseman put things in perspective for him too

140 page slide show.  Wow.

oh so youre a simp

Political speech is ineligible for fact-checking

“The host also knows that addressing racial issues in a visceral and unbelievably ignorant way guarantees ratings.”

Having “less of an advantage” is not a disadvantage

“Bills of Attainder” doesn’t apply here because Musk is running a platform that allows people to impersonate public figures, which is kind of a Big Fucking Problem.

A Chinese accent? You’re a racist moron. 

You stayed up till at least 4aam workshopping that an you still sound dumb as shit

Have you been hiding under a rock? Musk and his flailing first fortnight owning Twitter deserves every ounce of ridicule posted in this article.

Wow, someone who knows even less about running Twitter than Elon. 

My loans aren’t covered by the deal but I’m not going to turn into some selfish asshole who only thinks about myself. I’m glad that others can get their debt taken care of.

You replace the washer when it quits.  No matter what month it is.  I don’t know anyone who can say “I’ll just use the spare washer until the optimum sale lands on my head”.

I don’t see the problem.

Problem” is a funny way to say “About fucking time”

“Check your balance here; if your balance is significantly over the threshold for total forgiveness, it may not be worth requesting back money that you’ll have to pay again in the future.”

LeVar is awesome and has been for a long time.

I don’t have an iPhone, so this article really doesn’t apply to me, but I wanted to take this opportunity to say THANK YOU for posting a “X# of Things” article without making it a stupid slideshow. SO much nicer to just be able to scroll down and read everything as I go. Again, thank you!