Definitely fake but in the movie version the whole family should be in on a fake wedding where Mary is the maid of honor. After she goes home, secret fun real wedding!

Was there a Burnett in the greatest Burnett sketch ever?

Today I had lunch with a friend whose family are conservative Catholics. He told me his sister is voting for Trump. I was all, “What? She’s a devout Catholic! And he goes against everything she believes in!”

It’s like they think people are purposely becoming addicted, poor, or mentally ill just in order to game the system for free stuff.

Imagine what it’s like to be the child, having police show up with their uniforms and walkie talkies and guns and cameras, and seeing them stand several feet away from you and take your photo. It just seems like you’d feel like a specimen under a microscope. Plus scared and unsure what to do, not really knowing if…

Although I’ve read somewhere that an American child uses 10 times the resources that a child in a developing country uses. So they can have 10 children and, ecologically speaking, it’s the same as someone in the US having one.

And I would go so far as to say two didn’t. Bernie’s plans weren’t well thought out or practical. If they had been, I would’ve voted for him in the primaries because he’s more liberal. But he’s armchair liberal, whereas Hillary is the general on the front lines.

And wait, isn’t gay marriage legal on a federal level? What do they mean “if the marriage is recognized under state law”? What am I missing here?

Wait, isn’t that even worse? That sounds like “if you have any unused paid time off, you have to use that first. Then you get the remainder of the 12 weeks.” Which means you can’t just add your paid time off to the 12 weeks — you lose those days.

This is just like meetings at work. It’s either “don’t be negative” or “we’ll iron out the details later.” Then the “plan” which was never thought through, fails. And none of the people who told you they’d work out the details are around to clean up the mess.

Hard to believe, isn’t it? With such small stubby hands.

People like this judge will tell you that questions like this are predicated on the fact that sex is most often consensual and pleasurable. So there needs to be a way to differentiate it from rape.

Vomit.

Team unnamed complainant.

Okay, wait. I googled Taft and it said he was 5'11" or 6 ft. And at his heaviest, weighed 332-340 lbs. Trump is 6'2" and it says he currently weighs 236 to 267 lbs. (Both Taft and Trump’s weights are depending on whom you believe.) Anyway, no matter what, that’s about 100 lb difference!

Oh, thank you for your sympathy. You’re very sweet, but I didn’t mean for that part to be the focus.

Off topic but she is so beautiful. Every time I see a photo of her I’m just captivated by her beauty, grace, and poise. It’s so hard to remember that she supports pure evil.

My dad died when I was 8 years old and he’s forever stuck at “daddy” to me when I talk about him with my family. My siblings are all older, and it’s funny to see where he’s frozen in time for them. To the oldest, he’s “dad.” To the youngest he’s “daddy.” To the ones in the middle, he’s either “dad” or “daddy”…

Not as long as it includes a Palin.

It’s just that some things don’t require looking up. The commenter’s point was that this was his/her impression without having seen the Life magazine description. It was an explanation of how a person could form an impression that was different from the one originally intended, not a “this discussion requires more…