You don’t need a clock, you just need the umps to enforce the current rules. Warn him to get on the mound and if he doesn’t the batter gets a ball. Same thing with the batter - if he steps out for 30 seconds after each pitch warn him then if he doesn’t abide he gets a strike called.

+1 hit wonder.

There may not be poop in the Bible, but if I remember my freshman high school Old Testament class correctly, there are golden hemorrhoids.

Over My Shoulder, but I’m a sucker for whistling in a song.

We’re not talking some free shoes or tattoos here, six figures is serious cash. We’re also talking bribery and funneling these kids to agents, which to me is much more serious than the cash. These kids put their faith in their coaches only to be sold out to the highest bidder.

If this was such a widespread problem (which it certainly is) why in the hell did it take the freaking FBI to bring it to light? Is investigative reporting really dead? I mean, sportswriters love to wax poetic about how corrupt the NCAA and college athletics is but apparently nobody had the gumption to actually do…

You should hear Lester go off on all the pitchers throwing in the upper 90's now. They’re all throwing too damn fast!

The Bengals do have real players - unfortunately none of them know how to fucking block.

Just buy the damn vest and be done with it.

Fuck Mike Brown for letting Whitworth go.

That was one pathetic excuse for a beatdown. She needs to take lessons from Art “Mongo” Long.

Is it really a catcall to ask someone if you can see their Quigley Down Under?

I think when you see someone give the nazi salute you return it with the same salute - except with just the middle finger extended instead of the entire hand.

I’m a Bengal lifer. Went to games as a kid when the Old Man was still coach, suffered through the Tiger Johnson/Homer Rice era, and lived through the lost decade of the 90's. The Old Man was a great football mind, but he made one fatal error in hiring Tiger Johnson instead of Bill Walsh. On second thought, make…

Where the hell is Al Davis when you need him? You know if he was still alive Kaepernick would be a Raider by now.

The Matheny Molina Manifesto.

Your poem is a wonderland. +1

I guess I should now start referring to former Red Ted Kluszewski as the Big Clu from now on.

You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. Outrage over the K zone? Some people really need to get a life.

He should refuse H2O because it’s Whitewater.