The trailer clearly marked this as either a movie with a bunch of good actors not giving a fuck and it comes out great, or a movie with a bunch of good actors not giving a fuck if it comes out at all. Rotten tomatoes says it’s the latter. Don’t do it, Bobby. Or do it, but don’t expect us to read your bitter review…

I love Jason Bateman very much. He was my first crush when he was Ricky’s “bad” friend on Silver Spoons (yes I’m old). I think that he’s just not considered for leading man roles so he takes what he gets and has a good time making movies with his friends. It’s a shame because he is such a good actor when he gets the…

God forbid people get the service they pay for.

plz tell Gayle I’m on treadmill & it’s hard to focus w/the circus around your neck

Isn’t the whole point that everyone asks him something?

I actually applaud it. I fly either with a small pack that will fit under the seat or I will check a bag. I absolutely cannot stand dragging a carry-on through the airports, and worse, finding out all the overheads are full anyway and it gets gate-checked. I know I’m a minority but I would love if all checked bags…

when a robot meets a robot, comin thro’ the rye

Mr heavy bags under the eyes, meet Ms heavy bags under the eyes

look at this tho.

I have taken seven Facebook quizzes just this past weekend. Secretary of Education, plz.

If you can decorate, you can be minister of interior .

Wait, you buy things...?

I think they should consider me for Secretary of State. I haven’t actually been out of the country, but I did have a passport (it expired, sad!). I have also watched a number of TV shows and movies set in other countries. I also learned German in high school (I’ve forgotten most of it).

I use money to buy things. Can I run a bank do you think?

Although I don’t have a medical degree and am a man, I’ve decided to pursue a head OB/GYN role since I spent the most formative parts of my life in utero. You’re an inspiration to us all, Dr. Carson.

“We don’t have confirmation that Secretary Kerry spent the remainder of Sunday in a dark room, sobbing as “While My Guitar Gently Weeps” played on loop”

Most are big; none are beautiful; very few are women.

I have the exact opposite reaction to Casey Affleck.

I listened to Kenneth Lonergan get interviewed on Fresh Air on Wednesday and thought I’d rather spork myself in the eye than go see a movie about a sad emotionally repressed asshole white dude.

Great, another entry in the White Ethnic Miserablist Canon that I can happily avoid. I hope Moonlight wins every goddamn thing.