Really? Instantly? Like as instantly as a gun? How fast and accurate do you have to be? What's your success rate been like? What happens if you try it on someone who has better reflexes than you? When you say it really isn't that hard, elaborate. How long would it take to learn? Like, an afternoon? A week?

No. Because the small percentage of people on this planet who could potentially kill you with their bare hands:

This!

I'm a telepath.

Seriously, it's like an ouroboros of casual misogyny.

Dear dudes who would consider using this service: The reason you can't get a date is that you are the type of dude who would consider using this service.

I love this, because it shows that there is literally no real reason for Bagheera and Kaa to be male apart from Men Are Default.

OH MY LORD, HIDDLES FOR BAGHEERA

Re: ingrowns time for TMI. I honestly haven't seen too many bushes besides my own, but I'm under the impression that my pubic hair is relatively thick and plentiful. I was getting a full Hollywood every couple of months for the better part of two years (from multiple salons because I was moving a lot) and literally…

Yeah, it's literally like "YOU SHOULD BE WORRYING ABOUT BEING SLIGHTLY HAIRY ABOVE ELSE EVERY SECOND OF YOUR WAKING LIFE."

Guys, I shave my armpits like... max once a week. I shave my legs if they are going to be on display. I used to get the bush waxed but after a few rounds of a) a lot of money, b) twenty minutes of intense pain and c) fucking WEEKS of ingrowns, I was like "Hang on, what the actual fuck am I doing?" Now I just trim for…

So yeah, any dude who ever recoiled in horror at the brush of a little prickle on my leg would be out of my bed and out of my life faster than I can yank a wax strip off my bikini line.

Um, no. Also, vomit. "Non-torturers" are not against torture because they're too emotional to handle the concept, they're against it because it's a gross violation of fundamental human rights as established and upheld by any number of international human rights organizations.

I also heard a "rumour" (a.k.a. decided it would be awesome and then had my feelings confirmed by Tumblr) that it would be Richard Ayoade and now I have decided that he is the definitive Newt Scamander and will be sorely disappointed with anyone else. DAMN THE POWER OF THE FANCAST.

Oh snore. Women ARE making films. There are plenty of women writing, direcitng and producing in indie film circles... a hell of a lot more than there are in mainstream Hollywood. Women are also highlighting and critiquing the current status quo in Hollywood. (Although, of course, when women do it, it's not critiquing,…

This is one of those super fun Women Can't Win things. If we weren't spending money on movies, dudes be all like "Well, why should the industry cater to women if you're not their main market?" If are spending the money and speaking as consumers, dudes be like "Yeah, well if you don't like it, why are you supporting…

Well obviously, women should arrange every aspect of their lives around the idea that could be raped at any moment. Except by being wary of strange men and rebuffing them if they approach you. That's MISANDRY!

Fun riddle: exactly how raped does a woman have to be before the people who are supposed to be on her side start treating her like a human being?

I've worked plenty of places, thanks. But I'm not the one making assumptions about what facilities were or were not available.

As for lactating, I have had experience with friends and coworkers needing to pump- IMMEDIATELY- to avoid mastitis. This is not that situation.