36 paragraphs confirming, yet again, that you should be anything but a sports writer.

Dumber and douchier than Billy’s dumb and douchey ‘Pool Boys’ douchebaggery.

Comments critiquing this blog for being moderately lefty and not straight journalism are one of the more exhausting parts of kinja-era AV Club.

He got better

They don’t try to hurt people?! They blew up Vince McMahon’s limo and killed him!

The line between /s/ and trollery grows thinner and thinner.

This country is facing a huge epidemic. Who the hell are all these kids claiming that priests molested them decades ago? Where is the police report? Clearly they or their loving parents would have reported it back then if this had really happened!

“Hi, I would like to report a sexual assault of a teenager by another teenager.”

Try as I might I can’t hate Zlatan. He’s the best heel of all time, maybe.

They should keep Tom Brady inside on days like this. Put him in his bandana and let him sit on the couch with you. He loves that. 

Kavanaugh seems to be the model of efficiency, demonstrating he’s a garbage human without wasting our time wondering if he’s got an iota of a scintilla of decency about him

“No unarmed kids were killed by cops this year, are you guys happy now? ”

In order to make myself feel better about my body, I just repeatedly tell myself that my body would have been the archetype of feminine beauty during the Renaissance.

Eat the rich.

The Miseducation was the first time I worked with musicians outside of the Fugees who’s report and working relationship was clear.

No.

It is possible, with practice, to hold more than one thought in your head at the same time. 

Politics is bad, twitter is poison, put them together and you see the worst of people. Progressive, liberals, conservatives, libertarians, doesn’t matter people are blinded by politics and twitters anonymity brings out the worse in them. Thank you for being a sane and decent person.

I’m honestly as tired as the “John McCain was a terrible terrible person who no one should say nice things about” pieces as the “John McCain was last of a rare and noble breed of American statesmen” pieces. Dude died just yesterday, and in my universe, it’s still poor manners to interrupt other people’s mourning with…