I would deep throat that pretzel though.

I have told this anecdote here before, but it's sweet enough to repeat.

Oh man I was gonna say the opposite - the JT one looks SPOT-ON to me!

"This time, I spray-painted it orange and called it 'Boehner in a box.'"

That's not scary. The ghost is obviously friendly. It just wanted to hold the cameraman's hand, and even closed the door when asked! Check your corporeal privilege, Mark.

I think you mean your "fucket" hat and your NOveralls.

My mother has always been a huge drama queen who freaks out at the smallest things. When my sister was around 13 she was hit by a car while riding her bike. On the way to the hospital my mother decided she wasn't going to flip out...for her daughter's sake she was going to stay calm and collected. So she walked…

how about button down shirts that are sized according to bra size and waist size? For example instead of my usual large size shirt, it would be 36D / 30.

hello! and britney's line will have cup sizes A-J which is more than most intimate lines can say

She grabbed at his crotch so hard she ripped his jeans? Holy shit, I would have bludgeoned her to death with the microphone, and I don't even have a pair of uber-sensitive testicles to defend.

Professional prince assassin decoy should have an official/important sounding title like "Prince Junior".

Freddie, Prince Junior. Has a nice ring to it.

I use scrunchies to put my hair up at night after I shower, because they don't give you that weird bump the way regular hair ties do.

Isn't Lorne Cardinal the best?!

Corner Gas FTW.

I get her point in that the parent shouldn't be afraid of their child's tantrum and give in. I get that she is speaking out against the parent creating more work for themselves (now there are 2 sippy cups to wash).

Kids these days...

I love Weird Al and all, but having all those celebrity cameos in the video is kind of tacky.

No song cooler than "Amish Paradise?" I don't know about that...

just wait until you see what he releases tomorrow...