That’s weird. I (also born in 1983) don’t really like barsoap for that reason. I always feel like I have a layer of soap on me, no matter what I do.

How does the wife even know you’re blowing your nose in the shower? Just keep doing it and don’t tell her. Don’t talk about it. What nose?

PS- Blowing your nose in the shower is fucking amazing, the steam loosens everything up. It’s great.

Looking back on the 90's (my formative years) I distinctly remember thinking “This looks old and crappy” a lot about things that just came out.

It seems to me the guy is more an idiot than a bigot. So he’ll probably win. And someday we’ll all look back on today as the day President Blankenship started on his long march to defeating the Chinapersons and their landcountry.

Close enough.

Ahh, I see you’ve played knifey-spoony before...

I like how she had to basically describe a garbage can to get her point across.

This email of the week has been bothering me for 2 days. So this guy’s nose won’t stop bleeding, he shit’s black yogurt, he blows his nose until finally a chicken tender of congealed blood comes out, his nose bleeds for another half an hour and then....HE GOES BACK TO SLEEP??

Phil Rirruto?

Most Yankees fans suck (not me though, I’m awesome) but a 5K performance deserves booing. A 5 K performance during an 11-4 win makes it iffy, but it’s still not crazy. People love pissing on Yankee fans, though.

Was Judge a four-time All-Star who led the league in homers and R.B.I. last season, was New York’s high-profile signing of the offseason?

You have to have an ability to play professional sports to criticize players now?

I hate Sterling. I hate Waldman more, but I hate Sterling and his dumb calls. It started out fun with him having a little saying for each player, but then it became “his thing”, so suddenly players weren’t just getting a little soundbyte when their dongs came out they were getting a novella using their names as a pun…

That’s what I thought. Seems to be an absolutely surprising disconnect...

This might be a weird question, but do Evangelicals even believe in “Saints”?

It’s weird because I was fine with them changing their origin because, like people have said, at this point Homer would be a Gen X-er and Abe would be...I guess a Vietnam vet? But what really annoyed me, a lot more than it should have, all things considered, was actually around the Bart-Kirk-toothpick-salt gag. “We…

I feel like the bulk of this was only kind of damning until that last paragraph. That was the knife to the dick. This neck bubble with a face is like Hannity talking about “east coast elites” when he lives on Long Island in a mansion paid for by idiots.

TIL Olympia still makes beer. I remember my dad drinking that all the time when I was a kid. I knew it was a crappy cheap beer even then. Cause, yanno, my dad drank it. I’d just assumed they’d gotten swallowed up disintegrated at some point since.

HOW DARE THEY BEHAVE LIKE PEOPLE AND NOT IDEOLOGUES!

Canyonero.