Generally I try to only judge a man based on whether he can slip melons or not, but this guy’s making me want to go out for some ice cream.

This is 100% accurate and you should definitely maintain this perception.

No. It’s not just “boys being boys” when it’s a 26-year-old bullying and exposing himself to a 12-year-old. I was bullied some as a teenager as well, but it was by kids my own age, not adults who should know better and not in a professional setting.

“Oh, how I long for The Burning Bed right now...”

BABY OIL!

I pulled a groin muscle attempting that very same maneuver after seeing that. THANKS FOR NOTHING

KINJA. It’s a mindfuck.

WE WILL WAIT FOR THE IMPENDING APOLOGY, MR. SLAYER

I knew her! We called her Crystal Caves!

The Internet is a flat circle, Freddie.

Yes! I was in astonished JOY throughout my viewing, SOOOOO bad, yet so fun! The golf-course ninja and the shattering tombstones were incredible too.

I’ve been on a bit of a *bad* movie spree lately, so am compelled to add the “V-8 seduction” scene from the batshit-insane, totally-80's Ninja 3: The Domination... (tho this YouTube clip stops short of revealing the extraordinarily hirsute nature of the cop character... yes, he’s a cop...)

Sigh. Why WOULD anyone want to do that with Mitchell??

No, he doesn’t, it isn’t rape (a word that gets diluted more and more, soon it will be as exact as “racism”).
I liked the original and I didn’t find it creepy because the whole situation was so ridiculous as not to be taken seriously. That’s about the same as finding it “tragic” that a little girl from Kansas is…

Salt-n-Peppa didnt worry about offending people. They were always willing to Push It.

Third Eye Blind is fucking hillarious.

I like the original but I think a lot of that is Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell. While watching, they are so enjoyable and funny and such good chemistry, you can forget that this is basically rape and kidnapping. I just can’t imagine the story working now.