Martha is going to attach egg beaters to her drone rotors, whip the clouds in to a crisp meringue and it will be delicious.

I thought he was describing a venereal disease.

Agreed, but I don't get why people that have already collected all the best games expect to be pleasantly surprised by PS+ every month.

I've always wondered exactly how that compensation works.

Yeah I refuse to believe this. The idea that an adult finds Bieber fuckable is pretty funny.

SHE TUK HER LUK

It's kind of bananas how much funnier Jezebel writers are compared to The Others.

So this is the only page that's broken for me. THANKS SATAN BUNNY.

I have finally found a hair net that will keep my beard hairs out of the sandwiches of customers.

Yeah I would hit all of dat too.

How do we feel about Creemore? Can I like Creemore? I think my metric for alcohol is, "this doesn't taste too strongly of sulphites or cat piss so I likes it"

Women have always watched action movies, and the trend is to make movies darker, more "gritty" and violent, much to the disappointment of humans everywhere. I'm not sure what they're trying to accomplish... maybe their target demographic is people that live under bridges like yourself.

Or you get all your boyfriend's nice furniture because, after an arbitrary amount of time has elapsed, you've decided they're yours now. If you can get it out of my apartment without my help, you can have it.

Oh right. I forgot there were handhelds in between the Gameboy and 3DS...

and it looks like the touch screen has been put on grid, so I think you can type in coordinates to tap stuff with an imaginary stylus? I could be wrong.

Hmm, hash oil might actually make fondant edible. If I'm going to eat a wedding cake it might as well be psychoactive

I want Aisha Tyler to have the Late Late Show. This is the only thing I need in life. Craig brings it up and they discuss it for a bit.

It's a dream come true for men. Suddenly your face is fashionable because you're too lazy to shave? Awesome.

My face didn't move at all, but I don't think a mildly distasteful pun is "punching down".

Kinja doesn't like my new Dante .gifs. I see how it is.