I am a public school teacher. I am sitting at my desk, which is in a classroom in a public school full of minorities and SpEd students, and I am weeping. I have about 9 minutes left on my lunch break, and I don’t know that I can pull it together in time. I am crushed, absolutely gutted. I am afraid for my students, I…

I’m on my lunch break eating a plate of chips with melted cheese on them. You can take your fat shaming elsewhere.

She stole that part from a real Asian actress like Emma Stone.

Yeah this is shade.

Honorable Judge Brown, I have been waiting since Tuesday to post this for your consideration. Be it shade?

All that she wants....is a Jeff Gi-loo-ly

To answer your penultimate question, I’ll give you an old George Carlin quote:

Are you familiar with this twitter account? It makes everyday life a little more bearable. Dogs are the best.

I’ve also seen damn near every episode of Intervention. What’s the most memorable episode for you? I still tell people about Christy—the tweaked out girl living in a place her dad rented for her. Remember she had notebooks full of her drug-induced philosophies? Her dad gave me the heebies.

FUCK SUSAN SARANDON!

Also Jill Stein, Berniebros, Gary Fucking Johnson and Susan Sarandon

So extra ...

people mean well, yet think poorly.

If Ollie is anything like the cats I’ve known in my life, she’s probably still in her enclosure somewhere not giving a damn about the people who are frantically looking for her. She’ll come out in a couple of days and pretend she has no idea what all the fuss is about.

Ollie’s headed to the White House. Pussy’s about to grab back.

Just let me run with my angry Alternative Fact

Her friends were on just outside my bathroom window a few days ago.

My husband did this stuff for a while before we met and now I’m pretty much living in fear that he’ll go senile at 40 from the head hits. I will never understand why he would allow someone to hit him in his beautiful face, but he loved it, and he didn’t even make any money off of it. My point is, people are weird…

They will never, ever divorce. They are soul mates.

I almost had a panic attack: