There’s probably ten times as much screentime devoted to Matt Damon talking to a computer (video journal) as to Stan’s entire character. If you’re hellbent on being annoyed by Matt Damon, you will probably hate this movie.

Stallone has partial facial paralysis from forceps used during his birth. You’re an asshole.

To be fair, Stallone is excellent in Creed. Really. It's not a zero-sum game here. Michael B got screwed (though Ryan Cooger really, really, really got screwed) but I'm not sure that should take away from Stallone's excellent performance.

I just want to make sure I understand the jez party line here.

People can die if their appendix reputers and they aren’t treated. These charlatans are the worst!!

this is why i always laugh the hardest at my own jokes, to show my strength and dominance.

Mozart’s pilot features a young oboist going to a cool orchestra party (in her own apartment) where she plays a classical music version of spin the bottle and all of the guests are just so. fucking, psyched. that she’s playing Bach.

I’ll start with the ones that lessen student loan burdens, help the working poor, support Planned Parenthood and other vital organizations, increase regulations where needed, and that’s just to start. Wow, that was easy

You just embiggened my spirit.

Aw, I love the sleeves! I kind of think they make the dress, all airy and floaty.

booty got leonardo like....

I’m just terribly excited for Lady Gaga. How fabulous would it be to win a major award for your first major acting role? And I’ve really enjoyed watching her on AHS. I almost hate to say it, but I actually haven’t missed Jessica Lange this season.

Oh, I should give a shoutout to Eva Longoria and America Ferrera for one of the only genuinely funny bits of the night.

This is a perfectly cromulent use of the word and not strange at all. The author thinks the decision was wrong. It doesn’t imply anything else.

She wins Favorite Dress of the Night.

I am incredibly pale, like paper white. They look much more colorful against something akin to glowing milk.

The phrase “eat a cheeseburger” is so incredibly obnoxious and body-shame-y. She’s naturally very thin, always has been, probably always will be. There are things that can rightfully said about her as far as her opinions and actions, but I don't understand why her body always has to be brought into it.

She is and WAIT TILL YOU SEE. I yelled ‘what is that?’ at my tv when I saw her.

He IS, in Mexico.