For the second time today, Keyboard Cat is Love, Keyboard Cat is life

Fuck Wolf Blitzer forever. CNN's coveraqge during the 2012 elections was absolutely disgraceful, throwing out facts and smudging the lines to find excuses to support #unskewed bullshit in a desperate ratings chase was awful and Blitzer was the poster boy. If Anderson Cooper ever leaves the entire network can safely be…

I hadnt heard about this, so I had to watch it immediately. Yet another instance of why "no capes" is the most pertinent invincibles line.

Yeah, "Buy my book"

Well you know what they say, a dick on your face is worth two in the bush!

*super spoilers*

She stayed with Frank because of his loyalty and power. He screwed over both in his playing politics with her ambassadorship. He proved in one shot that he values the office more than her and was more than willing to kill her career stone cold as an afterthought. Why would she stick around after that?

I think Underwood would have Leslie on a train back home in about 3 hours.

is that at all related to Ho Dew?

Jeet kune do pales in comparison to the one true martial form, Rex Kwon Do.

theres a joke in here about being able to stand on stiff legs but I cant quite work it out without guaranteeing my spot in hell

*slaps side of sound panel* sorry it does that sometimes.

I got married because I love my wife and she loves her permanent resident status.

Bro if youve got snakes on your plane see a doctor not a tattoo artist.

Keyboard cat is timeless. Keyboard cat is love.

No, I'm … doesn't..

Come back when you know how to save a life.

They had him working the sandwich press, its like half a step above toast of course it was easy.

I have the stupidest brain on the planet, I never associated Eliot with Becky until now. Thanks AV club for once again lowing my standards of my own intelligence.

How do you get glitter off your dick?