It’s like they used a leaf blower instead of a fan.

Well that’s a simple fix with a repeal of the 13th Amendment.

He’s telling you that this guy not only got good at writing jokes, he got so good at writing jokes.

It just shows our laws are only as good as our judges.

That link you posted shows him NOT slapping her, but he did push her and he’s obviously an abusive asshole.

“Tastes so good, makes you wanna slap yo employees.”

At first I was like, maybe this particular crime doesn’t qualify for elevation to hate crime, but then I read the actual law, and it absolutely fucking hits it dead center.

Lol, they don’t have to pretend.

That one’s an acquired taste, and pretty uneven.

It’s Kubrick’s finest work, tbh.

🎶 This is my last resort. 🎶

You gotta put polynesian sauce on that chicken, and get it spicy, and then add hot sauce (preferably the sriracha you brought in your back pocket and fuck you sat on it, but that’s okay, there’s still plenty left in the bottle) and then some mayo (or ranch for those of you allergic to mayo) and then drink like a…

This is the BEST BIT:

Look on the bright side, at least this nominee has job experience.

They said they were arresting her for her own protection, so basically she talked back to the cops.

The best meat is in the rump.

Yeah, nothing wrong with that statement by itself, but she’s all kinds of crazy. Not surprised why someone would call the cops on her lunatic ass.

“Why are you talking to a dog?”

The FBI goes where the FBI needs to go. The irony is that Trump references Watergate, which was an FBI investigation of a sitting President. If the President is not above the law, what makes Trump think his campaign was?

“SEE, I KNEW OBUMMER WAS SPYING ON US DURING ALL THOSE TIMES WE MET WITH FOREIGN AGENTS AND CRIMINALS—ERR BUSINESS ASSOCIATES!”