I like this concept in my heart, but my brain skipped a beat as I read “make it a camper”. Because you somehow compressed so much work and cost and frustration into those four words; it might be the most efficient use of the English language since the term “regime change”.

As if “make it a camper” was like saying “scrap…

Given this list, we’re going to be fast friends. Or at least, I’ll watch for your columns.

Jalops, we’re better than this. Are there no standards? Clean and functional or no, this is a blasé, uninspiring, non-land-yacht GM sadness box.  None of you want it.

No. You had it with Alien.

I’m officially calling BS on the white paint on the doors ending 3/4ths of teh say down and going to black, as if the white was the truck way up in there air. This, painting white all the way down to the running board is what it really is: still way cool, but lardier in proportions.

I’ll go with that. CAI as a reasoned decision or one necessitated by an awesome engine swap.

I’m thinking of people with GTIs like I last had (may it rest in peace) where people would put on a CAI and then just have the check engine light on for the rest of their blarp-y pizza-delivering lives.

(Mine had a big rash on…

This might get me excommunicated from Jalopnik, but if any seller ever installs some dumb cold air whatever, I’m moving on.

If you need that extra three horsepower, just buy a better car. Or at LEAST keep the stock set up and put it back on to sell the car. If you can’t think that far ahead, you’re not a person I want…

Have you ever done a background check on someone and found they have a judgement against them from a casino? That’s not someone you want as an employee or a love interest.

So it is with an air conditioner. It’s not functioning? It “needs a recharge”?
Move on. The owner is either desperately poor or they have personal…

I saw one of these last week, well kept, with what I would guess was a 4-inch lift. Man, what a difference that makes! It looked great, and I’m usually an SUV hater.

The year models I was looking at were 2012. Back then, the Golfs were still made in Germany, while the Jettas were made in Mexico. That could be part of it.

Part 2, I remember particularly that the doors felt lighter and cheaper, specifically. They didn’t close with that satisfying single -thud-. That could be…

I drove a TDI Golf for a lot of years. When my wife needed a new car, I test drove some Jetta wagons.

Dude. Jettas are NOT the same. They’re cheaper feeling and less refined. Someone more into VW or more into cars can tell me what it is. All I know is, getting back into my Golf was like “Oh, no way would I ever get a…

No, no, that’s true. I most notably spent $5,00o on a Lincoln Towncar that gave me another 150k (sold for 800), $3,000 for a sell-back diesel Jetta with over 240k that gave me another 10 before sell-back, drove a chevy van to 220k and sold it for $800...but then I paid a little over $6k for an ‘06 GTI, only got 20k…

Yeah. This. “The A/C doesn’t work”.

Translation: wow, it’s so expensive. I can’t fix it because I have no money.

Translation: I have absolutely let this car go to crap in a myriad of ways that can’t be seen on the internet, but I’m hoping a detail job will lure someone in.

I’ve done the “drive it till it dies” MANY…

My folks always installed a dash mat as soon as they bought a new car. They live in the Mojave desert and rarely park in the garage.

That said, they are the ONLY people on earth who do this.

It’s landing site, trust me.

My dad’s parents drove from California to St. Louis to give him a 1970's Sedan De Ville for free while he was in grad school. It was gold and in every way wonderous to the 6 year old I then was.

I have a special place in my heart for a low-slung, mighty, spacious, and luxurious rear-drive Cadillac.

This is none of…

I admit I adore this car.  It’s just so fun.  But that much money buys a lot of normal car. 

Weathertech floormat is the effective shibboleth, here.  I had to vote No Dice, because it was, but this is well kept and the owner paid extra to make it so.   I believe in this truck, even if it is overpriced.

“But the previous two powertrain options left quite a significant power and price gap for a sporting sedan. There was a lot of room for competitors offering sedans around the same price point with around 300 HP, like the Toyota Camry...”

I defy you on this point. There never has been a person considering a car who…

What’s happening to me? My “no dice” radar was always consistent with the group; since I picked up that 4 cylinder Camry, and bid farewell to my GTI, I’ve voted Nice Price on everything fast. This included.

Freudian Nice Price.  I know cognitively that I’m wrong.  But I am compelled.