I think his rear suspension articulated his position quite nicely.

Justice is served!

Um, can I get one restored by Toyota instead?

LS or gtfo

How sad is it that 300lb at 5'9" isn’t considered abnormal?

Carburka

I referred to a couple guys as “hipsters” the other day and boy did they get upset. Apparently the politically correct term is “conjoined twins”.

Went to a bar in Chicago, total hipster neighborhood, to meet up with friends. Some rail thin bartender with a handlebar mustache scoffed at me when I asked him if what his favorite beer was, like I was supposed to know. So now I go to my corporate job every single day and I will move up the management ladder until…

I think I can speak for all of us when I say we’ll be rooting for him.

Spencer did nazi that coming....

Anyway, we know where this is going: Someone is going to have to lure Donald Trump out of Trump Tower with a six-foot portrait of himself and force him to be president.

PEEOTUS

*Watersportsgate

Urine the wrong place if you think we’re just going to ignore the sketchy nature of this report. My NUMBER ONE priority is seeking out the truth.

They didn’t want to make too much of a splash.

alternate headline:

since he cant sell burgers at his restaurant and can’t sell his steaks at sharper image, he has to take his beef to twitter.

i think cleese got it...

Well I think the problem is that they have a category for “Noise attenuation” but not “Noise sexification”.