Humans would be #1 if there weren’t laws deterring us from killing each other...

“By the way, Carson Wentz is legit. I can’t even hate. He’s polished and accurate and the size of a goddamn mountain. I fear his rookie poise.”

12 weeks of “paid” leave....more like 6 weeks of paid, and another 6 weeks of “hope you have short term disability insurance”...

(that’s) What she said!

There was a play during the first quarter, a run to the right by C.J. Anderson, and Norwood (WR #11) on Denver went to block the strong safety, and got blew up helmet to helmet! While on his hands and knees trying to figure out how to keep the world from spinning for a few seconds, he slowly got to his feet, almost…

Maybe read the First Amendment? Also, the tournament is being held in Canada.....

My last tweet will be my first.

“Aldon Smith is on suspension and can’t run over your son while drunk anymore.”

It’s a total mind-fuck, especially if there is any wind involved. Put a skyball into the wind and you can actually get it to come back, angling towards the net/back line, and can be fairly difficult to read. So as you’re staring into the sky for 2 or 3 seconds, wondering if you have time to get a quick sip of water,…

Yeah, but you’re a Cubs fan, so he would have an equally relevant topic to roast you on too. So....in no particular order we have Milton Bradley, Zambrano, Bartman, Goats, 108 years...and growing, Wrigley Field, etc. I’m sure I’m forgetting some important moments in embarrassing Cubs history. I still think he’s got…

What’s next? He has to putt under a windmill and into a clowns mouth?

When I travelled to New Zealand a few years ago from Chicago, my wife and I had no issues with Jet lag when we got there after 17 hours of flight time. We left Friday night and arrived sunday morning, completely skipping saturday, so it seemed like one long overnight flight. The return flight was way harder on our…

Regarding insurance, that isn’t entirely true. I have a auto-debit from my checking account and it is the same amount as if I were to pay it off every 6 months.....So it’s actually a benefit for me to pay it on a per month basis.

Everytime I see something about Pacific Rim i think of this:

Gonna have to re-read the books...the question is, do it before, or after seeing the movie?

Maff is hard....

Kinky, but where do you hang it if you’re not wearing any pants?

That’s a cool looking sardine ball. Draymond Green must’ve destroyed the other one.

Dunk it in a Cream Sauce, and call it a Croque Monsieur.