Promising or threatening to leave California? Because that sounds like one of my wishes coming true if they actually leave. Two of them, if they spend their weekends at Santa Cruz (learn to fucking drive or stay off 17!).

Was it me? I don’t know if I count as “regular” in any sense of that word, but HYDROX FOREVER but since they don’t make them anymore, Late July’s are an acceptable substitute. So are Trader Joe’s Joe-Joes. Oreos in extreme emergencies.

I disagree. I recently was ghosted by someone who had been a fairly good friend, and that was so much better than some sit-down about how our lives had changed blah blah blah. Sure, the Facebook “unfriending” was a bit weird but on the other hand, didn’t notice for a long time and don’t care.

I have a kidney infection today so I guess I'll commit some atrocity because that's what people with UTIs do.

Corgan’s cat advocacy is an awesome thing.

I bought at $620K 4 years ago; it’s worth $1.3M now and I have 50% equity at the purchase price. I'm in the Bay Area too (Los Gatos). Sometimes it doesn’t suck being old!

I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to humblebrag. I was just trying to brag-brag.

Used my investments to pay for my (small) wedding - and then to buy a house on a half-acre lot in Silicon Valley.

If I found out my ex was engaged or married, I'd feel very sorry for the poor woman who was now legally bound to a human millstone. A woman as awful as he would reject him.

My birthday is December 26. I can count on one hand how many birthday parties I’ve had in 50 years with fingers left over. I’d DIY but no one’s in town. So yes, it is my special fucking day and I'll take that free birthday coffee!

Keep in mind that although Mr MaidenForm and I have been together for 23 years, we just got around to making it legal 8 years ago, and that I was in my 40s; and I may have been hot as a youth but those days are long gone; and I’m often very oblivious.

Yes, please add that so I can wash my undergarments in an irritating chemical. Sounds like a fantastic idea.

You think that's bad? She's related to me. I'm not exactly sure how closely, but she even resembles me so there's that.

For the past two weeks, I've been having steamed Brussels sprouts with salt, pepper and butter for lunch because they are delicious and easy. When I'm cooking them for other people, I make a sauce of butter, cream, chicken stock and the juice from the steaming. Guests eat them out of the pan before I get a chance to…

I know what you meant - I just like complaining, especially after another exciting round of Poop Hunter :-)

I don’t know if I’d go that far ... :-) Actually, it’s not that big a deal. Three get prescription food, but they love it. One gets insulin shots, but he’s a big sweet potato who seems to understand I’m sticking a needle in him to make him feel better. The pain in the ass is the one with a pain in her ass; she has…

You'll like this, then: every year, he goes to CostCo and buys a bunch of pet stockings filled with toys and takes them to the shelter. If he could, he'd take home all the dogs and send all the cats to me.

Weasel-shaped Siamese and nose-less Persians are just so ghastly, especially since those are two exceptionally nice cats (my favorite cat is the kind with ears and whiskers, though). Giving a Persian perpetual eye and breathing problems doesn’t make them sweeter-natured and narrowing the brain case of a Siamese…

:-) Awwwwww

My brother has a dog like that! She’s a rescue St Bernard. She also has severe epilepsy and must be given her medicine twice a day at exactly the same time. She’s allergic to wheat, gluten, soy and a bunch of other stuff, so they buy hundreds of pounds of whitefish and potatoes to cook he food she can eat. She’s…