Have you ever been attacked by a house cat? Cats don’t fight fair.

Karma is a bitch

It’s 10:59 AM right now and I’ve been thinking about lunch for two hours.

Is 11 really too early to think about lunch?

If he was any good at stopping things before they bust we wouldn’t be here, would we?

No no, because HamNo wants the GOV’T to overthrow the rich and then distribute their ill-gotten gains out to him. You don’t expect him to actually do the dirty work, do you? What HamNo doesn’t realize is that in his fantasy, the so-called intellectuals, no matter how poor, go on the pile just as easily as the…

My son’s pitches top out in the high 50's (probably, never actually measured), and those scare the hell out of me when I catch for him. The fact that he has zero control of those pitches doesn’t help any.

Yeah, on this one and the last one (mom listening to the sports on radio) ol Ufford here makes some pretty big assumptions about the situation (based on nothing), and then proceeds to chastise the writer. I never though I’d say this but I miss Drew. Somehow in his absence they managed to find someone who is much less…

Inevitably, as you get to know them, a question always comes up: “How many different countries’ citizens have you had sex with?”

Thank goodness it wasn’t a mortar injury.

Like dad used to say - “son, never do 100 yard sprints in a 90 yard gym.”

I feel for the kid, when he came to they probably asked him his name, to which his likely reply was, “Fuck. It’s still Cade.”

That was a long way to go for that payoff.

Bling and a miss

If your reaction to breaking your diamond chain, is to throw the remainder of said diamond chain into the dirt in disgust, this is a sign that you may have too much money.

Good to know what Danny Almonte is up to these days.

Are you talking about flatulence? Different kind of bean

I think it would be really hilarious way to score a moral victory if the opposing team, down 82-0, stopped throwing any hittable pitches. Walk 45 runs in in a row. If the batter tries to swing at the horrible non-strikes, bean them. Force the game late into the night, far into the triple digits. In fact, maybe you…

The terrible part is the league has an 83 run mercy rule.

Or, you know, “damn there are some unbelievably impressive people in both genders, how amazing the human race is!”