An iPad in each hand is a balanced diet.

Ship... out of danger?

Oh no he didn't

I need one of these to see if I dropped my kid's pacifier under the couch, again.

Hmmm I see now, and yes I am indeed subterraneanly inclined as well.

Dear Mr. Hoover,

Dear Mr. Hoover,

27 of them?!?!??!!!!

Armed with this I will never stop being AFK.

That must get clusterfuckly confusing when all of you shout that you have the same name at the end of the movie.

perhaps a comma would've done the trick for the lesser neuron'ed?

Here's to hoping that they have a relative filter, and not a filter that's relative.

Oh goodie! A 4TB hard drive for my computer! 3200rpm? 'Green' you say?

There's actually an 'R' in Moronpocolypse. #sarcasticcorrections

They got out from under Deutsche Telecom a while back, 18 months ago-ish? They are their own US based company now, which at the time promised more flexibility and movement in the market, but I blame the Vibrant being stuck on 2.1 so long for their demise.

One of the biggest ways the Italian mafia has stayed in power in the face of increased FBI annoyance has been the air traffic control program, apparently.

My prosthetic neck is cause for getting a ticket? That's discrimination against ex-giraffes.

The new Gawker layout has achieved sentience.

The only place I've actually seen a Photo Booth-manipulated photo in the wild is deep within 'Random' named photo albums on facebook, and yet every customer I talk to says, "I wanna get a new laptop, and my kid wants a Mac so they can do Photo Booth."

::opens door:: Mr. Lebsock, Mel Gibson holding on 4 for you.