I thought the "just ask" guy was saying more "ask for what you want" aka "do this, stop that, right there, yes" and not "please sir may I come"... But! What I really wanted to say here was, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. Your husband's attitude is, "I got mine, let me sleep" and "sex must never be discussed"?!?! YOU POOR DEAR.…

This is how all my "I guess that was an orgasm?"s were before I really put a lot of work into figuring out my configurations. Like, what combination of mood, fantasy, focus, hydration, and stimulation of what and how, would do it for me. And even then, they were weak, and only got stronger the more diligently I had…

Ah, see, I think discussing appearance is not a binary occurrence. Not all discussion of appearance is body snarking, and even if there are eight billion other Jezzie posts disagreeing with that assessment, I give zero fucks. Anyone with a modicum of common sense can see a logical distinction between, "Why are his…

"This man's eye color is not a medical condition but a matter of pigment - many dark skinned people have sclera ranging from white to yellow to red to muddy brown."

That is the information we were seeking. We didn't ask him, we didn't make him uncomfortable, we asked the internet. That makes us the ignorant [whatever…

They eat nothing but pure protein (e.g. plain chicken breast for every meal), and then it isn't simply that they don't hydrate — for the final few days before they event, they take a regular course of diuretics to actually flush as much water as possible out of their bodies. They actively DEhydrate to get everything…

Dude, why so touchy about it? I myself was genuinely wondering if this was a medical thing, an environmental thing, or simply a genetic thing that I am unfamiliar with.

Just because YOUR intention if you had asked such a thing would be "gossip" does not mean OUR intention is that atrocious. Nobody was snarking. Calm…

Honestly, it does stand up. I have a pair that I bought at least 6 years ago that has some pilling between the thighs (because mine rub together enough to start a fire), but not too much and it doesn't impact the fit or function at all.

Yeah, I definitely got that impression after the other guy walked/stood right in between him and his interviewer. He was obviously it-boy that night, and probably didn't even have a rash in the first place, and the crew chemistry I'm seeing there is MAGIC. Hilarity. I love them all.

BADUM CHING

The internet has a comment thread for you somewhere, I'm sure. Ask and you shall receive.

Your niece wins ALL OF THE INTERNETS.

I think part of the problem might be that, with him, you DO often have to assert your dominance, but you are reluctant to do it.

Hah! Remind me NOT to hire you as the photographer if I ever have a wedding!

Also, she's like 17 years old, right? I don't even think my eyebrows were symmetrical by 17. This is nothing!

And no one would have noticed! Especially not in pictures! In her position, I'd be all, "This doesn't really work, but seriously, who's gonna look that closely at my toes? There'd have to be a close-up of my feet in full dramatic focus for this to ever register, and that's not going to happen. Obv."

Cruel,…

If it weren't for this photographer, she totally would have gotten away with that.

So, do you realize that you're a textbook narcissist, or no?

I mean, yes, when you're unattached, having sex on your terms is good times.

But it sounds like you're deliberately configuring your life so that you never have to compromise or predicate your actions upon the satisfaction of a partner... which means that, at…

I know, right? My first thought too.

Ladies and gents, if you are anywhere near LA, there is just such a genius at work on the westside, and I can verify that she is worth every one of the many pennies she charges.

If you are anywhere near LA, I have a stylist for you.

Revisit the shit out of that, because anyone who doesn't leap at the chance to change their name to "Androyd" with a legitimate line of reasoning and everything, isn't thinking clearly.