Put your Balotelli boner away, totally irrelevant in any possible way in an article about Harry Kane

If you were trapped on an island at sea with Kevin Draper and you had a loaded revolver and that island was Oahu and you weren’t actually trapped and Draper said something stupid and his breath smelled bad, just how many slugs would you put in him before it made you smile? Would you have to reload?

It’s 2050. Technology has advanced incredibly. Human beings now have a way to see what their children will resemble based on half of their own and half of their partner’s looks. Terrible news, your children are hideous. They will look like Kevin Draper. You don’t quite know what they will act like yet, but you’re not…

How far can Kevin Draper shoot a ping pong ball out of his vagina?

What age will Kevin draper lose his virginity