Fix, Pence, and none the wiser...

I ordered a pastrami sandwich once at a restaurant, and neglected to mention it should be hot. Note: cold pastrami is kinda gross.

The server could have intoned, a la Joshua...

This is just out of left field, but isn't calling a woman a whore intended to hurt her feelings?

"we climbed every mountain before it was cool"...

In Florida, you could get married by a notary public! Don't know if the latest batch of crazies have changed it.

In the notification, your reply was cut off saying (I thought), 'The finalists are supposed to be high...'. I thought, 'Well, that explains it then!'

Wasn't there an episode (in a tournament, so *maybe* the questions were harder) where all three contestants finished Final Jeopardy with $0 and none were allowed to go to the next round? That has to vie with this for contestant haplessness.

So recovered ego addicts attend 'Anonymous Anonymous' meetings...

An actual book (movie, too!)

Law enforcement, has always been so unfeeling with regard to criminals, I mean, they arrest them!

Pavlov is sitting alone in a bar, drinking.

Dr. Pavlov paging Mr.Grammer...

It was a joke soft drink mentioned on 'The Simpsons' (tried to find a picture). There was a pig on the label although ,as Homer explained above, there was no lard in it.

Well, did you know that "Lard Glug' contains neither lard nor glug?

And when surgeons open you up, the little light turns on...

Looks like a job for Kikkoman!

To be honest, I'm surprised they still sell Pinot Giglio after that awful Ben Affleck- Jennifer Lopez movie...

In ancient Greek myth, Tantalus serves his own butchered son, Pelops, to the gods...(the gods except for Demeter, don't eat it and mange to revive Pelops) , Tantalus gets to be 'immortalized' in Hades, and as element #73; Pelops gets to have the Peloponnesus named after him.

As Chevy Chase said in season 2...