In fairness to them losing to the John Fox Bears is pretty impressive in its badness.

I sort of love that no shoe guy thinks the world operates on Airbud rules (there’s nothing in the rulebook that says I can’t be barefoot)

To the white supremacists who will appear in the greys: your traitorous and slavery-loving great granddaddy doesn’t deserve a participation trophy because he got his a__ kicked in a fight that he started, you whiny snowflakes.

I was really hoping for one of these:

From Julian Carr’s 1913 Silent Sam dedication speech:

Y’know, I’ve had very limited direct exposure to this guy until your display here, but holy god, is he hateable.  

SOME

A rich white lady with thin skin? Man, I believe it when I see it.

Seriously, SO MANY QUESTIONS. We need a follow-up, STAT.

HOLY SHIT THAT HUSBAND IN THE EMAIL OF THE WEEK

Here, I made this to help with the visual. Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!

Dude is below zero, then fifty feet of crap, then him.

Direct Method: Yell at him to shut up. If he gets lippy, stab him in the face with a spoon.

It took me like 30 minutes to read that bizarre bulletin board story, I had to keep going back several paragraphs to try to figure out what in the flying fuck that guy was going on about. AND I STILL DON’T KNOW

The dorm room billboard story, is one of the weirdest and most pathetic things I’ve ever read. It’s like an Ayn Rand novel. 

Just a point I want to get in about Chicago Style dogs before Fourth of July grilling here in Illinois. A hot dog in the Chicagoland area can still have ketchup, it is just a Chicago Style hot do cannot have ketchup and mustard is a must.

I think a number of things keep the tone stable. First, Amazing was a selfish asshole, not a true hero at all. He let the villain out on purpose to make himself MORE famous. Second, his death was partially caused by him getting impatient and refusing to calm down and talk them through a life or death issue because,…

It’s blink-and-you’ll-miss-it, but if you watch Cavill’s left hand closely you’ll see it dips out of shot and then returns with a handful of spinach which he shoves into his mouth.

Who says nobody called Pablo Picasso an asshole?

Ballpot Dome