Hold up now, Family Matters at least had the distinction of being utterly batshit insane! To paraphrase Key & Peele, they turned a blue-collar Cosby Show into Quantum Leap. To this day, I’m still amazed by that. 

Have you seen the first five Spider-Man movies?

It was kind of both:  Being able to have female spies on a show like that was empowering back in the ‘70s but they also made it super male gazey so they’d get eyeballs on the screen.

Was Charlie’s Angels ever really for women though? I thought the whole point was that it was super male gazey. (This is a genuine question; I’m too young to have seen the show.)

It’s all fucking shades of beige.

gaddamnit, y’all gonna OK Boomer me cause wtf “ecru couch” mean? is that like a faded tan brazilian or what? Don’t leave me to figure it out all alone ...

I read this as J.lo’s Couchi is “unsullied” and was like yeah, hmmmm, ah I don’t know about that, I mean she did go out with Ben Affleck.

During a bout of insomnia I speed-read Jodi Sweetin’s memoirs, which compelled me to go back and watch some episodes of Full House, and then Fuller House, which in turn prompted me to look up ancient family curses that kill one’s spouse after the birth of a third child, concluded with a Googling of the Olsen Twins and…

it would be so much worse if it wagged 

“Can someone please remove this annoying fucking thing from my face?”

I am going to be the only one... but... the tail grosses me out. 

That still at the top of this makes it look like an SNL sketch.

I think it’s more that we’ve seen it before.  Many, many times. 

What if they put up a Baby Jesus in a Manger scene?

Why do I have “Wanted Dead or Alive” stuck in my head now?

The United States Board on Geographic Names (USGS) considered the appeal of the Ambassador of Ukraine to the United States and replaced “Kiev” with “Kyiv”, as the correct spelling for the capital.

I always scroll past the trump tweets as quick as possible, because nope thanks, but I feel like I’ve seen “READ THE TRANSCRIPT” everyday for like a week..?

Look, the reason why our playgrounds are so dull is because Americans are very prone to sue. And why is that? Because of our shitty healthcare situation. In some cases, suing is the only recourse if you have to pay a huge unexpected medical bill. So, cool article, but way to ignore the single underlying reason for why…

You had me at “Go get 2 shots at lunch today.”