But now who will MSNBC install as their token kinda-sorta-conservative? (Not that I care.)

I fear no one will be attending Scarborough Fair this year, no matter what leafy garnishes they're selling.

About 20 years ago, a teenaged ImpromptuJ watched a riveting documentary about the Ku Klux Klan on that same channel, back when it lived up to its name. The doc was in-depth and gritty and didn't shy away from the unpleasantness; some of the lurid facts have stuck with me all through these years (like the horrible…

To be fair, he was only caught bad-mouthing some anonymous Hollywood bimbos. He would have to be caught on tape insulting his own followers.

Now the REAL scandal emerges.

You shoulda seen how disappointed I was at that 10,000 Maniacs concert.

OK, I get that. If all opposites were taken to their logical extremes, you'd be walking around on your wrists and burping oxygen.

Are you short, thin, and handsomely bald, with disproportionately large hands and skin that's an unnatural shade of blue?

Aw man, and SNL just lost Bobby Moynihan…

We should pile up stones around the world's forests to halt the beetles' momentum.

(ahem)
"No. Master strategist. I'm playing 3-dimensional chess here."
"Uhhhhh, Don? 3-Dimensional chess is just…regular chess."
"No, you…er…it IS? Uh-oh."

BTW (at the risk of stating the obvious) doesn't this mean that every single rumor about Russian collusion—and there have been a LOT of them—now have twice as much weight to them than a few weeks ago?

THE LEAKS ARE REAL
THE NEWS IS FAKE
THE FEAKS ARE NEEL
THE RUSE IS LAKE
THE NEEKS ARE FEEL
THE LOSE IS RAKE
AND EVERYTHING IS GOING JAKE

Even murdering an underage pizza delivery boy? (Or something)

But Trump has a cameo in Home Alone 2!

"Kellyanne, would you PLEASE stop defending the undefendable?!"

Eh, he'll have his "A Face in the Crowd" moment one of these days…

Think anything you want as long as you still vote.

Trump repeated "No Collusions, Fake News!" to the rumors and reports from unnamed sources for months and months, and yet Russian collusion today was confirmed—admitted by the candidate's own namesake son. So the biggest question America should be asking itself right now: If This Is True, What Else Is True?

But Trump has an extensive IMDb page!