High quality with low calories at half the price!

Sorry, unless you can show me the museum, church alcove, or city park where these statutes are currently standing, I'm going to have to declare them a total fiction.

Too Byzantine for the Trumps. I'm pretty sure all the collusion was instigated by good ol' fashioned blackmail.

FAKE STATUTES

If it was literally any other family in politics, I would go, Oh, 4-D Chess. Clearly there was a smart strategic reason to release this incredibly damning piece of evidence.

He had a Dad who was also President!

This is definitely what you would call a "Somethingburger."

Are you talking to us or the Trump family?

Uh oh—is Bill going full Aykroyd in his twilight years?

Dann Florek: "In my day, you'd have to go to a dark back alley to argue with an asshole. Now they come right into your living room."

Really thought that said "looking for Arses."

Holllywood being Hollywood, they're just going to recycle the script from Wayne's World 2 and swap out the "WW" references.

Me, I prefer the Broadway musical.

Sure, but why single him out—and not, say, Warren Harding—as unqualified?

Kermit's voice isn't exactly hard to do.

BTW—the others I understand, but what's your beef with Jimmy Carter, anyway?

Well, all of them save Grant spent more time in elected office than Trump did. Or Lincoln, for that matter.

No one ever went broke underestimating etc etc etc

Relax, he's not the one who did it.

I wonder what time the stampede over from Drudge begins.