The combination of insects and technology is especially grotesque for some reason. About 12 years ago, I worked an outdoor Tower Music kiosk at the Hollywood Bowl, and on my first weekend a HUGE cockroach ran up an extension cord and directly onto the register I was using.

I'll never forget one of the first times I ordered Dominos online, and noticed afterwards they told you exactly which employees worked on your order…

You know, eventually, the stopped clock is going to read the correct time for a single minute, and Trump will do something genuinely, unimpeachably human and decent and warm.

What is it about this story that's made Hollywood want to tell it FOUR times?

Citizen Kane starring…

My vote is for "cowards," actually.

I copied and pasted this from someone on the other page. Let's play a game: Transcript or Parody?

Let me absolutely sincere for a second: presidential trivia was one of my hobbies growing up. Yep, I'm a huge history nerd, or at least I used to be. Now everything about the Presidency just bums me out. I can't even do my "name all the presidents in one breath" party trick anymore—when I get to the end, I just feel…

I don't think I care for this new President!

THIS JUST IN: Everything Still Hot Garbage.

I too am quasi-attractive.

"And Waldo, sir?"

Well, I'm definitely NOT going to marathon these. Even when the show was at the height of its powers, I needed a break between episodes—or face a sort of riff exhaustion.

(Van Jones is an African American news commentator who previously severed in the Obama administration, and before that, worked as a civil rights activist. Doesn't necessarily make him not-racist, but he's very definitely not-white—so it's kinda bizarre to call him that.)

Right? And notice how there's not even a pretense of strategic intervention or human rights or anything like that this time. It's just an ghoulish, hollow "War makes us strong! Hooray for all-purpose destruction!"

You are very uninformed.

CNH, I know you've already seen it and I respect your opinions and admire your expertise, but—nothing you say can spoil this for me before watching myself and drawing my own conclusions.

What am I watching this weekend? Hmm, let me open up Netflix, and…(gasp)…

This Jew says bullshit. I'm familiar with Steve Bannon, I've been to Breitbart, and I know white nationalist fascism when I see it.

While I agree with Jon Ronson that not everyone should be savagely punished for saying something dumb on the Internet, I'm not particularly worried about this guy. This wasn't a single offensive tweet; he agreed to have an entire article written about his life. So either he knew full-well what he was getting into, or…