I always get confused when I hear mortality rates are on the decline. Who's out there becoming immortal?

Is it worse than 50 rapes?

I'm almost positive every single Cosby rape joke is going to include some reference to pudding pops.

That's Yale. Every Harvard grad I've ever met says they went to school in Cambridge and forces you to follow that up. Yale grads? They'll put that shit out there before they give you their first name.

As punishment they will not be able to rack up a six figure debt at this particular institution.

For the record, going to a bar where they flip my drink around and occasionally stop everything to recite poetry might be my version of hell.

Bottom Gun

I worked at a Hungry Howie's in Florida with a similar side operation. The code was to order a pizza "with extra cocaine"

See that's the problem with being an edgy white guy who uses the N word ironically. You only look cool until one black guy says he doesn't like you doing that. So long as you can get every single black guy to nod in agreement you're fine. Otherwise you look at best, like a goddamn idiot and at worst a racist. It…

"A rich white guy shouldn't say the n word on TV"

Maybe politically. From an originality or joke structure standpoint I can't imagine anybody would be very impressed. Either way, I think he's a boring hack.

It's not even edgy. This is the "hold me back" way of shocking people. Oh, wow. This guy must get black people. Look at the confidence he had in dropping an N-bomb for no fucking reason. So woke.
Maher is a hack. I say this as a liberal, and I know that I probably agree with the guy on most policy issues, and I'll even…

Kevin dumps her for getting too fat.

Smart. If they do this from the start everybody just says Kevin James is devoid of ideas and is only cannibalizing past success. But he went through a whole season before bringing her on board. Kevin is very patient.

CP Time With Bill Maher

I think I expected more action. Is it kind of a slow burn? I don't remember. Probably pregamed a little too much.

I remember watching this in college and wondering why people liked it. I don't remember much but I hated that movie.

Massachusetts. Right by the water.

Why doesn't the AV Club hire a deaditor?

There is a 100% chance Trump calls in ICE on at least two of those Planeteers.