The Saudis sawed up the wrong guy.

62.9 million people voted for him. That’s more like 18 or 19 percent. #hope

meanwhile...

I hope her husband’s fucking around on her like mad.

nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

maybe if he’s smoking it over pecan wood...nah, not even then.

you gotta roast them brussel sprouts

You can make flour out of acorns. I hear pancakes made from it are downright sublime.

Cilantro, thyme, onion and garlic powder, parsley, various dried peppers, various salts (smoked sea salt is so addictive), sage, rosemary, cumin, smoked paprika...fuck, I’m forgetting at least half a dozen right now.

not soon enough

standard operating procedure

another victory for Team Dog.

hunter of the shadows is rising

Well, she apparently can’t find a Jewish guy her age who’ll date her because she’s a rabid Trumpanzee, so there’s that.

1975, you say?

*in Mix-A-Lot voice*

what the frag’s wrong with this clown?